Emerging Youth Pastor

New Seires- Weird

2011-09-22T09:32:00.000-07:00

I know I haven't been up on this blog much (I've been focussing on my other blog: www.youthmaster.blogspot.com) so, this is kind of a revamp of this blog. I'm back and want to share all the stuff I put together so you can get free content and free ideas and help for your youth ministry!

Inspired by Lifechurch.tv and Craig Groeschel's series: "Weird" is the new series I am running with my Middle Schoolers here in the inner-city of Pittsburgh. In fact, I read both the book "Weird" and seen the series "Weird" by Lifechurch.tv and thought it would be a great jump off series for our teens here. It's all about how being normal (as the World defines it) isn't really working. In fact, being normal is not what Jesus was nor does he desire us to be that way either.

Jesus was weird and challenges his followers to be the same. Weird is Good and Jesus goes to great lengths as to show and tell us how we are to be weird in this world.

I took from the Weird series, but really shaped it to a Middle School crowd for the kick-off series of the year. I put a good amount of time, prayer and effort into this series and thought it best to share it with you as well. Similar to how I have done in the past (if you remember) I have posted my work on archive.org. In fact most of my old stuff is here: http://www.archive.org/search.php?query=marv%20nelson.

I am also recording all of my talks in case you desired to listen to them as well. I believe in sharing the things God gives us and I also believe in giving those things for free! Use these things as you see fit and I pray the Lord blesses all of us this coming school year as we delve deeper into the lives of teens, parents and leaders alike!

Just click the links below:

Weird Series Sermon Outline

Weird week #1 Talk

Weird Series Small Group Questions

For further questions or thoughts, please feel free to email me at marvin.nelson@acac.net!

Pinnochio Vs. The Real Boy

2011-04-13T08:38:00.001-07:00

This has been a long time coming, but as of March 20th my book has been out for sale! I can't tell you how grateful I am to those who helped me get this off the ground and the willingness of my family to share our story with the world is an extreme blessing to me!

I started this journey about 3 years ago when God sparked my heart to do a sermon series on 1 John 1:5-2:2 with my then High School Students in Nyack, NY. Once that series ignited the hearts and lives of those teens, I knew God had a message to share and he wanted me to write this book.

After writing a couple of chapters, I hit a wall when no publisher desired to print the book, plus I had taken a drop in hours and pay from the church due to the economy and I had to get a second job.

During this time on hiatus from writing I was working 2 jobs, having a baby (well, my wife was) and working towards my Ordination in the C&MA. I felt that if the book wasn't going to be published, I wouldn't keep writing but something in me woke up after I got a new Pastoral position at ACAC in Pittsburgh, so I finished the entire book (6 more chapters) within 3 months time!

I looked at the evidence of this and realized God wasn't done yet, nor was my dream of getting this book published. I went back to the ground, re-writing the same publishers who refused my book before and then some. All of them, except one denied me again. The one that excepted me caused me HUGE excitement, so I shared this with the Associate Pastor at my church (John Stanko) who is also an author. He saw the dumpy publishers website and said we could do better if we self-published.

I had a decision to make...to go with the publisher who accepted my work or self-publish which would cost about $4,000. I prayed and thought about it and decided to raise the money to get published. If God desired the book to be out, the money would come and the book would be printed.

That is exactly what happened! God proved Himself faithful and the money was raised in 3 months time! Now, after the long journey the book is published!

John Stanko always said the hardest part was yet to come, meaning once the book is out, marketing and selling the book begin. He couldn't have spoken truer words. This IS the hardest part of book writing...getting your book sold and in the hands of people. You want to share how amazing the book is, without sounding like a self-promoting, arrogant jerk. You desire to see people transformed by the book, the way you were and others who experienced the book were without being pushy and showy.

This is the tension I now live in. I know God desires to use this book for Youth Workers, Parents and Pastors around the world but I am not enough to make it happen. For people to hear about it, others need to share it. It's now in His hands and the hands of those who read it.

I am praying for the book to go viral, where people share it, live it and give it. If you have a copy and read it, would you blog about it? Would you review it on Amazon and Barnes and Noble? That would go a long way. If it positively or negatively impacted you, write about it. Write me. I am available to chat about this project, so please email me (marvin.nelson@acac.net), comment on the blog here about it...whatever you feel you need to do. Thanks!

If you haven't read the book and desire to, Amazon just put it at a 15% discount here: http://www.amazon.com/Pinocchio-Youth-Workers-Guide-Authenticity/dp/1581693745/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1300887514&sr=1-1

So, check it out and let me know your thoughts!

Taking Your Licks

2011-03-09T07:45:00.000-08:00

In Ministry, it's foolish to think you won't feel like these beat up old shoes to your left...because it's going to happen.

The past couple of weeks have been that way for me. I feel a little beat up, bruised and banged up. I feel as if I could be doing something better with the ministry, yet it still seems to be slipping into chaos.

God has been doing some amazing things: we've grown! Students are hearing the Word preached and some 19 kids have accepted Christ this year! Those are some sweet, recordable things in ministry. Some would call them down right milestones.

Yet, we are in a hurting place. We lack leaders and with an influx of students, especially inner-city students, this lack becomes a hindrance. My leaders have been hanging tough but I know it's been hard for them to come and not feel overwhelmed. I know some Wednesdays they may not want to come, but know they can't not come or we'll be lacking that much more on a Youth Group night.

This tension has been killing me because I deeply care for my leaders and desire them to love what they do, and I desire to see God grow the ministry so that many more students can hear the Gospel. I wish I had a manual that said: Here's how it's gotta go. Yet, no such manual exists.

What's worse is when someone tries to lead me down a path of correction I get prideful and feel attacked rather than helped. I know I need to grow, I know what I'm doing isn't always 100% effective and things have got to change in order to make things work better and for kids to desire to come, as well as the leaders to feel blessed it what they're doing.

I am praying for God to show up in a mighty way and I felt led to share with my leaders what's been going on inside of me. Below is the email I just sent to them:

Hey Team,

The past couple of weeks have been a bit rough. I am under no illusion that Wednesday Night Blast has been a walk in the park for either you or myself. We have all been pulling through and making due with few leaders and a growing population of kids. The reality is we need more leaders and some of you may need more from me as well, and if that is the case I am sorry. I feel as though Student Ministries in a lot of ways is under spiritual attack and I think we need to pray for one another and for the ministry. I am praying for more leaders and for myself to be more assertiveness in kicking kids out and making examples of those who are not doing as they should. I will also be telling a few Wednesday Night students to shift from Wed to Tuesday so we can alleviate some of the pressure. I really covet your prayers because I desire for Middle School to be a place where 1.) Kids come to know Christ and desire to make him Known and 2.) Where those ministering within the ministry feel blessed in doing so and don’t feel like a truck hit them every time we have Wed. Blast.

I deeply care and love all of you and if there is ever a time you are feeling overwhelmed or have ideas on how we can run things more efficiently I do desire your input. I desire to be open in how we can make Blast fit those 2 desires I have (and I believe you have as well) for it to fit. Today, my prayer time is for you and this ministry. Lastly, I do truly desire to start that prayer time for the ministry I know a couple of you who have been showing up early to pray and if you can make it for prayer, I think that will truly help as well. Lovin’ all of you!

I know God is going to show up. We need to cast our cares and prayers unto Him and he will produce what is needed. It's a time for me to be "Taking My Licks" but I know God is the Victor because he was Victorious on that Cross!

NOISE

2011-02-23T10:20:00.000-08:00

The Lives of our teens are filled with NOISE, just flat out loud visual, emotional, spiritual and physical noise that distracts them.

Noise that takes the form of stupid shows like Jersey Shore. Noise that takes shape in Facebook, TV, dumb books and and waste-of-time-boyfriends.

All of this noise, which comes from our common enemy is to distract these teens from having a true, honest and meaningful relationship with their Father.

How can we help teach them to quiet the Noise? How can we help them identify the Noise? How can we come alongside of them and whisper the importance of solitude?

That's what this past series has been about for us in the Middle School Ministries at ACAC. We've been doing a whole series based on these ideas and asking the kids to look at the Bible and what God says about the Noise around us and why we need to get quiet, get alone and listen to His voice.

The first week, we jumped it off with the Nooma Silence video, which highlights all the Noise that people add to their lives daily with cell phones, books, TV, facebook and so on. It was a great launching pad to discuss the many things that take up our time and in fact how much time those little things tend to eat out of our lives.

Last week, we talked about the Story of Elijah and the Noise of His expectations of God. Elijah ran away after he won a huge fight and he "wanted to die" because he alone was left worshipping God. God desired to show him that he wasn't alone, but Elijah had some noise of fear and his own agenda that clouded his hearing from the Lord.

This week (the final week of NOISE) we are discussing the Noise of our Limitations. In Luke 9:12-19, we see Jesus and a huge crowd of people coming close to meal time. The dicisples start freaking out and ask Jesus if they can tell the crowd to disperse and go to a town or a village to go eat and sleep. Jesus looks at the disciples and tells them to give them something to eat.

They see two fish and five small loaves of bread and say that feeding the people can't be done. Jesus sees something different...he sees a meal that can feed over 15,000 people!

Our teens need to know that with God they can dream BIG! There is no need to fear limitations we may see in front of us, because He is greater and mightier than any limitation! We have got to turn down the noise of our limitations and see the possiblities of our lives when God is for us and calling us!

I've been super excited about this series and have seen it effecting the lives of our teens!

The Compulsion of the Gospel

2011-02-03T11:25:00.000-08:00

"We are not in contact with another world. We are happily in contact with this world. But those disciples were other worldly...the Church these days does not have a sense of wonder" (Tozer, The Mystery of the Holy Spirit, pg. 56).

I've been thinking lately and asking myself why teens have been walking away from faith, trying to see a pattern with what's going on and what Youth Ministry should look like in order to lead students to a life-long journey with Christ and not simply a "while you live at home" or an "until college" journey with Christ.

One of the things I've noticed is that church for many teenagers is boring, dry and dull. For them it boils down to moralistic platitudes that some people like to follow out of a need to feel good about themselves. There is no real excitement about God, or about the Christian faith in the minds of these teenagers. There is no sense of wonder or other-worldly excitement about them.

Teens need something compelling. If we take the compulsion out of the Gospel and numb it down to something boring, natural and fake they will not desire God.

Teens gravitate towards the things that compel them, why have we taken the compulsion out of the Gospel? Why have we anesthetized these teens to the Supernatural? God is BIG, God is mighty, yet teens seem to get the message from us in youth ministry that God is an old man with a long white beard sitting in heaven, trying to keep us all in line.

That is NOT our God. He is not boring, dry or dull! He is powerful, mysterious and altogether supernatural!

Sadly, I think our teaching on the "naturalism of God" or the "moralistic platitudes" is due to our own sense of losing wonder, we are not living enough in the supernatural to be able to effectively teach about it. So, we bore teenagers with the things we already have in our heads about God, not the things that God is capable of.

We take an extremely radical, supernatural God and make him normal and just like our parents who tell us what we can and can't do. What teen wants to invest their life in a God depicted like that? What normal human being wants that? We not only dumb down God's power in and through us, but we de-radicalize Jesus to a "guru" who said a couple of nice things.

Kenda Dean makes this point really well in her book called Almost Christian (which I am now reading) and just recently on Mark Oestreicher's blog saying: "If Christianity is dangerous, then we need to act like it. Teenagers aren’t afraid of risk, but they want to know that Jesus is worth it. Young people are going to demand that we, the church, be who we say we are–people who obviously follow Jesus, which makes us “weird” in a culture based on self-actualization and self-fulfillment–or they’re just not going to bother with us at all" (http://whyismarko.com/2011/the-future-of-youth-ministry-part-5/, 2011).

Jesus was weird because he was supernatural. He didn't hold to the religious or even earthly and natural constraints we as the church are living in today. Healings, miracles, prophecy, justice were all a part of his ministry...those are all supernatural or un-natural ways of life and those things can only be accomplished by God and His power.

We teach a way too safe gospel these days and teens just don't want to sign on to it. I just recently preached at a Student Leadership retreat and very few of the student knew about the Holy Spirit, much less the power he gives us as believers! The Holy Spirit is the catalyst for a compelling life! He is our supernaturally given source of Power to live the Christian life of justice, miracles, prophecy and healing!

The Gospel, when told rightly is a compelling story that draws one into the narrative. A narrative that is hard, but supernatural. When we lose teens because we're teaching a tame, lame and boring gospel, we are doing the wrong thing.

Let's bring back the wonder in our preaching, living and teaching. Let's call for radical self-sacrifice, supernatural living, because when teens are drawn into that type of story they won't want to leave, they'll be drawn in and give their lives to a narrative like that one!

Uncommon Friends & Peer Pressure- Review

2011-01-05T11:31:00.000-08:00

Recently, I was asked to review some curriculum from Gospel Light and the first one up for review is The Christian Life. This book is put together in a 12 week series, with 6 of the sessions being on

Friends- Building Relationships; Strengthening Friendships; Serving Our Friends; Gossip; Jealousy and Unresolved Anger

The second half is 6 weeks on Peer Pressure: Standing Firm; Beware and Be Wise; Get Your Ears on Straight; Go by the Book; Plug into Real Power and Stand or Fall.

The title of the book is where the curriculum takes you and I must admit Kara does a great job of getting you there. Each session is set up with several different options for ice-breakers and teaching interactions. All of the lessons and activities are well done and very creative.

After reviewing 2 of the same curriculum types in this series by Kara, I think they will all end up being the same structure. This, like the other book I reviewed is very well done, very well thought out but heavy on activity. I enjoy the Scripture used in each section of the book and feel they are the right passages to be studied, I just don't want teens to miss the Scripture for the sake entertainment.

With any curriculum, you will find this tension I'm afraid, especially when you get to the younger groups in their teen years. Our society has sadly numbed teens to need constant entertainment in order for them to learn. However, if the teacher who uses this material is wise, they can be the judge on what activities to use and which to leave out so as not to overshadow the Biblical truths these lessons present.

Another thing I have found as I lead a large number of Sunday School teachers is that they don't want to have to go and get too much stuff. For some of the activities in this book, there is a lot of "going and getting" this or that for the lesson, which will end up going ignored. The teachers I lead want me to give it all to them, so there too, I must find a balance.

All in all, this is another good book and an excellent resource to help frame a solid 12 weeks of teaching.

The Amazing Christmas Race

2010-12-15T10:55:00.000-08:00

It is that time of year again and my wheels have been spinning with some new Christmas ideas and I thought I would share what I'm doing this Christmas to see if it can help any of you all out there.

First off, let me share an amazing resource with you. Many of you may know this, but Minute to Win It hosted by Guy Fieri is a sess-pool of amazing youth group game ideas and there Christmas ideas are just as potent as their other games. I grabbed some of my great ideas from this site here: Minute to Win It Christmas.

Our theme this year is the Amazing Christmas Race (as you can see from the above picture). BTW We created that logo here in our office, so feel free to steal it if you like. The key idea of the race is that we all in our lives are racing for something, we live our lives racing around for more money, more gifts, more other stuff and we miss what our life race is really about: Jesus. Jesus is what we should be living for, racing for and looking forward to. We have a guest speaker coming in to give an evangelistic message about his race for fame and how God showed him the real race he should've been running for was for Jesus, not for fame. He will then share about sin, the cross and the meaning of the Incarnation with our students.

The theme is closely following the show "The Amazing Race" in that we produced a film series of our youth leaders going around our city (Pittsburgh) doing the amazing race. This project was a lot more work than I anticipated and would've been impossible without our iMac, so just cautioning anyone from trying it without time and a Mac. I usually would display the videos on youtube or something, but each of them are about 8 minutes long, which is a bit long...but I was stuck with what we shot...

We will end the series on the night of December 22nd, which is our Christmas Party. Here is the layout of the night (with some descriptions)

6:45-7pm- Registration, hang out, get some drinks listen to some Christmas music

7-7:15pm- Grab food, eat, sit at tables and hang out

7:15-8pm- Games
                  - Face the Gingerbread Man (from Christmas Minute to Win it)
                  - Wreath Madness (from Christmas Minute to Win it)

                  - Total Recall (A video based game where you have (2) 2 minute clips of Christmas films and after each 2 minute clip ask specified questions. Leaders at the tables have the answer keys and will verify the person who gets all the questions correct)
                  - Santa Beard (A game where you have pairs (as many as you want) come together and one person is "Santa" and the other is the "Beard Builder". The Beard Builder uses Foam Shaving Cream (must be foam, NOT gel) and they then attempt to build the best Santa Beard they can within 3 or 4 minutes
                  - Cookie Decorating (We are having 300+ cookies for each of our teens to have about 3 cookies per person to decorate)

8-8:05- Move from Gym to 2nd Floor Fellowship Hall

8:05-8:30- Evangelistic Message based on the "Amazing Race" theme

So, that's our Christmas Party in a nut shell. What are you doing?

Stereotypes and Why They Stink

2010-11-30T06:49:00.000-08:00

In my inner-city Youth Group, we've been discussing stereotypes, bigotry and racism. We've been going through a series called Ethnic Mosaic where we've been trying to break down some of these walls. Below is some insight I found in my reading on the subject of stereotypes; Enjoy.

One of the causes of stereotypes is called automatic processing. “Even further below awareness is something that psychologists call automatic processing, in which stereotypes are triggered by the slightest interaction or encounter” (Murphy Paul, Annie Where Bias Begins). This can happen to anyone at anytime where they have a poor encounter with someone of another race or ethnic background then themselves and they attach that experience to all people of that particular race or ethnic background. Dr. Dirks in his week 6 lecture defines out a bit more what stereotyping is: “Simply put it [a stereotype] is a generalization about a group of people. According to Wittmer (1992) when we stereotype someone we “hold a rigid and fixed impression of a group of people, which we then apply to all members of that group” (62). Martin and Nakayama frame a stereotype as, “Widely held beliefs about a group of people” (41). Or in other words we could say that it is a form of generalization” (Dr. Dirks, Week 6 Lecture 2010).

This goes a long with what I said above that not only is the stereotype attached to the person who may have brought about a bad experience but the stereotype is attached to the whole race or ethnic group that person belongs to. This is a dangerous thing because a stereotype a person has forces that person to then encounter people of a certain race with a pre-judgment, not giving that person a chance whatsoever. I see this is my youth group a lot. I am a youth pastor of middle school students in the inner city, where there are also a fair number of suburban white students. The interactions between these two groups is harsh and very hateful. Although the teens don’t realize it they are pre-judging one another based off of their stereotypes.

This is where the stereotypes become a prejudice. “How do we define prejudice? Calloway-Thomas, Cooper and Blake (1999) describe it as “negative attitudes toward others based on faulty and inflexible stereotypes” (98). It is a “negative attitude toward a cultural group based on little or no experience” (Martin and Nakayama, 43)” (Dr. Dirks, Week 6 Lecture, 2010). The problem with stereotypes is that once made they are hard to break, there are as Cooper and Blake say:“inflexible”. It becomes a solid belief a person has of another race and is hard to break down. In my own life, I had a prejudice against black people and it took several black youth group leaders in my life over years of time to help me break down my own prejudice. God is his sovereignty used these men to guide me down the path of love rather than the path of hate.

Another cause to the forming of stereotypes comes from the environment and culture with which we live. “Much of what enters our consciousness, of course, comes from the culture around us. And like the culture, it seems that our minds are split on the subjects of race, gender, class, sexual orientation” (Murphy Paul, Annie Where Bias Begins). If we live in a culture (or a home) that has certain stereotypes within it, we are more likely to attach those stereotypes and prejudices to our own mind. When all we see are minority men and women going to jail on the news, our minds automatically say that all people of this race or ethnic background are bad…especially when that is our ONLY interaction with people of that particular race or ethnic background. This then forces a person to look at the cues their own environment are giving in way of stereotypes. What images are we exposed to daily that could assist us (or our children) in developing a stereotype? What shows, movies or news stations are we exposing ourselves to and what messages are they shouting in light of this idea of culture helping us define our stereotypes?

Here is an eye-opening quote about the exposure our kids get when it comes to stereotypes: “We learn the subtext of our culture's messages early. By five years of age, says Margo Monteith, Ph.D., many children have definite and entrenched stereotypes about blacks, women, and other social groups. Adds Monteith, professor of psychology at the University of Kentucky: "Children don't have a choice about accepting or rejecting these conceptions, since they're acquired well before they have the cognitive abilities or experiences to form their own beliefs” (Murphy Paul, Annie Where Bias Begins).

When talking about the causes of stereotypes, I think environment and culture are the strongest, especially since they happen to us so young. Once we have this stereotype, any interaction that proves it solidifies that stereotype even deeper. We must be wary and cautious as to what we expose ourselves to as well as our children. I believe so strongly in this that I am teaching my middle school students the importance of coming together and I am taking 6 weeks of teaching to share with them why stereotypes and prejudice is destructive and against God’s plans for mankind (especially within the church).

Uncommon Games and Icebreakers- Review

2010-11-19T10:40:00.000-08:00

As a Youth Pastor, one of the most annoying things for me to do is make up games week after week. I love to be creative, I love to push the boundaries, but some weeks I lack motivation and quite frankly come to hate making up games.

I used to be a "Lone Ranger" and try to develop all my curriculum and make up all my games...I've come to grips that although that is fun and can really challenge me, I don't always have the time to make all of that happen from scratch!

I'm sure my sentiments are felt widely from those of you reading this. I'm sure like myself you've tried a ton of game books, but some were harder than others to follow and a ton of the games required a ton of time to pull off. Jim Burns has done a great job of making this game thing easier by writing the Uncommon Games & Icebreakers book.

Not all the games are off the charts awesome, not all of them are easy, cheesy, peasy to get done but most of the games in here are pretty solid, well thought out and fairly easy to pull off in good time. I enjoyed seeing some of the old classics, alongside some new ones. My absolute FAVORITE part of this book is that it comes with a CD which you can print off all the instructions and details for each game! I like to keep my leaders in the loop and if I can email them the directions for a game ahead of time, they love it...this makes that easier than ever. Plus, if you have an intern (or yourself) setting up the game, you can easily print off the list of things needed and how to set it up.

I appreciate the time this took to make and think it is a great resource for any youth pastor/leader to have. I also like Les Christies book, but this one was much easier to follow and pull off then Les' book and the CD included is just plain amazing!

If you're looking for a games resource and want something convenient , yet fun this is the resource for you!

Fist Fights and Ripped Jackets

2010-11-18T07:06:00.000-08:00

On Tuesday night at Youth Group, we had an issue with some of our teens.

Youth Group was over and outside a couple of teens were messing around slap boxing, when it got serious. One of the kids hauled off and punched the other kid, which spurred some angry words and more serious fighting. Three others jumped in on the one (much smaller kid) and began to punch him and drag him across the pavement by his jacket. This action caused the young mans jacket to rip which really angered him.

One of the youth leaders caught the scene at the end of the dragging and broke it up. We called all the teens in to have a discussion about what just happened at the consequences of their actions.

This is where I was shocked. Fights break out and you have to deal with them so that didn't surprise me, what surprised me was the attitude of the teens involved. When we were talking to them about the situation we shared the severity of what they did and asked them what a cop would've done if he'd have witnessed the scene.

Shortly into this discussion some of the boys began to smile and laugh, having no sense of understanding as to what they had just done. There was no remorse, there was no conviction just straight defiance. We asked the young men what was so funny and how could they laugh at this situation. They had no answers for our questions, only more laughter.

We brought in some of our church security guards and let the young men know they aren't allowed on the premises for 3 weeks. We shared with them the severity of problems if they violated this punishment and they still didn't seem to get it.

This lack of care really re-woke me up to the grip Satan has on the city. It's no wonder teens very similar to these young men get thrown into jail. It's no wonder the city is in turmoil with theft and violent crimes; because most of the young men don't care. I called the moms of these young men and they started to care then because they knew they'd be on punishment for what they did and they knew that their actions were going to effect more than just Youth Group but still, the attitude was there.

I told the boys that its sad that I care more about their future than they do. I told these guys that I loved them and I want to see God use them and that I pray for them to come to grips with how serious their decisions are for their future.

I had the privilege of driving all of these boys home after all this long discussion about the incident. I was able to speak with one of the teens moms face-to-face as well as one of the father (BTW the father could've cared less) and interact with their families on a deeper level which was one good thing I suppose.

This blog is a bit more thrown together because I have tons of thoughts swirling around about this evening, I know however that this is the city God desires me to work within and even though its tough He can and will use me in this place in the lives of these teens! I love what I do even when I see these crazy things happen and the lack of care or understanding I know these kids do have hope, they are not hopeless as many would write them off as. God has the power to change them from the inside out and my job is to keep loving them and leading them towards the Father!

The Christian Life- Uncommon Jr. High

2010-11-12T07:24:00.000-08:00

Recently, I was asked to review some curriculum from Gospel Light and the first one up for review is The Christian Life. This book is put together in a 12 week series, with 6 of the sessions being on the basics of Christianity: God the Father; God the Son; God the Holy Spirit; Our sinful nature; Our need due to this nature; and Our response to God.

The second half is 6 weeks on the fruits of the Spirit: Self-control; Joy; Peace; Faithfulness; Gentleness and Patience. There is also a small thing in the end titled: How Do I pray?

This is where the curriculum takes you and I must admit Kara does a great job of getting you there. Each session is set up with several different options for ice-breakers and teaching interactions. All of the lessons and activities are well done and very creative. Something that did bother me slightly is that each lesson is so filled with activities, that the biblical points seem to get minor importance. I know we're dealing with Middle School students and we need to keep them engaged but playing a huge game that takes about 10-15 minutes to only make one small point about a Bible passage seems a bit odd. Don't get me wrong, the games all line up with the point being made and they do it well...I just don't want the Bible to be secondary to the teaching. Remember, this is just "one mans" opinion.

Like I said, this book is very well done and extremely well laid out. The content is right on and the level is right at a 5th-7th grade level which will hit most Middle Schoolers, so I am excited to see that. Some Middle School stuff is either too low or too high but Kara does a good job of getting to the right level. I appreciate her insights and the time she took making each session have impactful interactions as well as teaching. I must say my favorite part of this Uncommon Series is the front page of each session, because it gives The Big Idea; Session Aims, The Biggest Verse and Other Important Verses right up front. It helps the teacher know whats coming, what they're teaching on and what point the lesson serves to drive at. This is extremely helpful!

My only piece of criticism (besides the minor role of Bible at points) is that to get the teaching materials, the teacher is constantly pointed outside the book they are holding. Whether it is to get supplies or to go to a website or to get the DVD of the curriculum, they are asked each session to get materials not in the book itself. This kind of annoys me because when I teach or hand a book to my Sunday School teachers, I would love for the majority of the stuff needed to be gathered in the book itself. Now I know for activities there is always a need to get supplies, but the need to buy a DVD to get the certain PDF's or video intros is what I don't like. I feel like the DVD should be supplied in the back of the book like in Novelli's Shaped By The Story. This brings all things together for the teacher.

I understand the need to sell a cheaper book to Churches, but if you're making them get the DVD anyways to fill most of the needed materials, have you helped? If Gospel Light were to provide all the materials online in one location that too would work...as long as it was easy to find and all in one location for each certain book.

I do like this curriculum and think I will definitely use portions of it in my own teaching. I feel it is better honed to a smaller church setting and is effective in helping youth pastors have good material on hand. I enjoyed reading through and gleaning new insights on what kinds of activities we can have our Teens engage in.

If you are interested in this material, you can buy it here: Uncommon: The Christian Life Jr. High

That Ain't Your Daddy!

2010-11-10T06:37:00.000-08:00

I work in an inner-city church with inner-city youth. Over my time here, I've seen some intriguing things happen in the lives of the teens, and not all of them are good.

One such time, there was a young man I'll call 'D' and D for the whole year was getting kicked out youth group left and right. The teens were sick of him, my leaders were sick of him and I was starting to lose my cool with this young man. He literally made it through the whole night 10 out of 35 times. Finally I told him it had been enough and if he expects to come back to youth group, or do ANY of our church activities, he would have to bring in a parent and the three of us would have a sit down conversation about D's behavior.

Well, the very next day after I have this conversation, I get a phone call on my cell phone from D. He says he's going to bring his dad in so we can talk. I say fine, come in as soon as you can. What D didn't know is that I knew his living situation and D would be lucky to have his dad come around for McDonald's, much less a meeting with the pastor. This is a sad reality but a reality I was aware of in D's life.

Shortly after the call from D, I get a call from the same number: D's cell phone and it is D clearly trying to pretend to be an older man. D as the fake man says: "Yeah, I'm D's dad and I understand that D has been getting kicked out and stuff. I wish I could come to your office but I'm in East Liberty and can't get there." I tell D that he must come in. I must talk to him face to face. D confesses it was his voice (as if I didn't know) and admits that his dad is in E. Liberty and he will make sure he comes in.

About 9 minutes later (too soon to have been from E. Liberty) a man walks in with D. This guy is old enough to be D's father, but I knew right away that he wasn't. We walk into my office and sit down and discuss D and his actions (I played into this fake father thing). This grown man continuously tells me stories of D at home and how he interacts with him mom and such (clearly having NO idea about D nor his relationship with his mom, or even his living situation since dad didn't live with mom). I let him blabber on and lie to my face about being D's dad and how we should give D another chance.

Eventually the man leaves and I take D aside and say: "D, that isn't your daddy" and we called D's grandma to confirm and sure enough, that man wasn't D's Daddy!

The really odd thing is that this was a turning point in my relationship with D. He knew I cared enough to find out the truth. He saw that I knew his grandma (which he was unaware of prior to his stunt) and that I cared to know enough about him that he couldn't lie about his family situation.

Inner-city kids like D are clearly lost but just as clearly need someone who cares about them because very few people do. Teachers hate kids like D because he is so much work to control and so hard to get or keep on task. As we saw, in D's case, many inner-city fathers care very little about their children and their mothers in a lot of cases are working several jobs to make ends meet; which leaves very little time for their children.

Since last year, I've invested in D by letting him come early to shoot hoops with me on group nights. I've also warned him that I would contact Grandma if he was acting up (I could NEVER get a hold of his mother, so grandma seemed to work for him). Moments of time spent with D have proved my care of him and my love for him. These types of relationships are what these inner-city teens need and once they have something of this nature, they latch onto it and listen when you talk.

I hope to see D come to truly know Christ and decide to not just know about God but to know God and then live his life according to this knowing.

Cultivating this type of relationship was really hard, long and arduous but it paid off big time. This is the reality of inner-city ministry: it takes a long time to make a difference but once you get there it pays off.

Christianity Cults & Religions

2010-10-28T11:39:00.000-07:00

I was recently asked to review a curriculum on cults and other religions produced by Rose Publishing, so I accepted the opportunity to see what was out there.

Let me start by saying that this is not a YOUTH curriculum but I thought is prudent to share here so that my youth pastor friends can see the wealth of stuff that is out there.

This curriculum has some good stuff and some bad stuff. Let me start with the good.

The handout that comes with the DVD curriculum is well thought out, well organized and helpful for anyone who desires to understand the side-by-side comparison of other religions to Christianity. It is super useful for teens who want to know how other religions compare to Christianity and desire to know why what they believe is the right thing to believe in. It breaks down a side-by-side comparison on: The founders of each religion, the writings of each religion, who God is in each religion, Who Jesus is, Who the Holy Spirit is, what salvation means to each religion, what death signifies and the other misc. beliefs each religion may have.

I highly recommend this handy hand-out because it is thorough and very interesting to see all of these religions side-by-side. The content is rich and very well presented.

This however, is where I leave the realm of what I saw as "good" because once we leave the pamphlet, we venture into the DVD. I thought the DVD was abysmal. The content was good, but the production and teaching was poor.

Each session opens up with a tall white guy with a huge beard standing in and obviously green-screened studio with a extremely fake background presented behind him. Right away, I am turned off to anything he is going to say because of this poor display of technology usage. He then is standing behind a glass, clear podium with his notes on it. He paces a bit and reads his note a lot and teaches with a very boring voice. His content is good, but you have to wade through all the negative audio and visuals to find that the content is any good. Next, there are pans to an audience who is all white and their glasses reflect the green screen studio, which makes the poor usage of technology again horribly apparent.

This continues throughout the entire clip of teaching for each session. Needless to say, I was disappointed with the presentation of the DVD and would've just taken the hand-out.

I think it is important to get the message across to teens and adults a like as to what other people believe and why so we have a better grasp on how to minister to them but the information has to be engaging as well as well done. I would again repeat that the hand-out is worth the purchase...just leave the DVD.

Hope this helps you as you too try to find ways to educate the teens God has entrusted to you with the Truth of the Gospel!

Slippery Slopes

2010-10-20T10:37:00.000-07:00

In life, we all run unto slopes that are slippery; those slopes that trip us up and cause us to stumble and sometimes fall.

The life of a Middle Schooler is no different, they too get caught on these slippery slopes of life and for them all too easily they fall and don’t even realize they slipped.

This series looks at 6 common slopes that slip Middle Schoolers up: Trying to be something they are NOT, Giving into the fake culture hype, Temptation, The Company they keep, giving into the hype of sex, drugs and violence and lastly using their mouths.

These are 6 common slopes kids slip and fall on. They are dissatisfied with life because it doesn’t look like TV, they want to fit in so they pretend to be something they aren’t, their friends are bad influences on them, they can’t handle (or even notice temptation), they believe sex, drug and violence are all part of a good life and they have no idea the power of their words.

The hope is that at the end of this series they will be able to more easily navigate the slopes they find themselves on and rely on God; His Word and their Christian Community to help them find sure footing as they go down the slippery slopes of life.

We've been running through this series for the past 6 weeks and desired to share this here with you all! I heard an encouraging story lately of people using these lessons for their groups and desire to keep giving out these resources as we develope them here at ACAC. Below are the links to download the stuff for this series!

Talk Sheets

PDF Questions

Picture

Missions In Your Back Yard

2010-10-13T07:12:00.000-07:00

When I talk to my teens about service projects or missions projects they automatically think of somewhere else besides their own neighborhood. When I mention sharing your faith or going out to proclaim the gospel, generally most picture themselves in a different city or country.

I fear in many ways we have taken missions away from home and made it a thing we emphasize people do 'out there' rather than 'right here'.

This then leads to churched teenagers, when asked if they desire to be a missionary to have a recoil and they say things like: "I don't want to live in the jungles" or "I don't think I could deal without clean running water". This to me is a bit sad because Christ's "Last Words" if you will were for all of us to go and make disciples.

He says in Matthew 28:18-20 "And Jesus came and said to them, "All authority in heaven and on earth has been given to me. Go therefore and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, teaching them to observe all that I have commanded you. And behold, I am with you always, to the end of the age."

This is a calling that every person who has been saved by Christ has. It's not a thing just for those who go overseas. We are called to live Missions focused lives, we are called to spread the gospel with our very lives and we are called to serve.

As Youth Pastors/leaders we need to be about both and in missions. We need to be about the 'out there's' and the 'right here's' when it comes to missions. Teens are so trained with sharing their faith 'out there' that they become inoculated and dumb when it comes to sharing their faith 'right here'. That's a sad testament to what we have been teaching.

The church at which I am a pastor is passionate about the both and of missions. My denomination started as a missions movement, so over seas missions is in our blood...but the church I am a part of also loves the city its in: Pittsburgh, PA! We are passionate about our community and realize it needs a ton of help. This passion for our community has leaked into Student Ministries and has infected us with a passionate desire to promote both and missions to our teens.

Just a couple of weeks ago we did a service project on our church campus and in the government housing across the street. We picked up trash, hauled metal, threw away broken up dry-wall, planted flowers, fixed up a local field and planted grass all while the community watched. Several people talked to our teens and asked what they were doing and why, they were encouraged to see young people caring for their community and we were inspired as well by their encouragement!

Last Saturday our teens engaged in a community project called Pumpkin Fest. In this event, we the church buy, make and distribute food. We sell it at a low cost but we work our tails off getting it all ready and then serving it. Our teens served over 1,400 people and had a joyful time doing it. The cool thing about this event is that the WHOLE community sees our teens serving and smiling and handing out food. They (the people in the community) get to work face-to-face with our teens and see that these kids are different. Also, with the proceeds of the event the community gets half and the other half goes to our summer missions trips (which are to different places). It serves the dual purpose of both and missions!

We, during the year do several other community service days to remind our teens that when it comes to missions it can happen overseas, in the next city or in your own back yard!

What are some other ways we can promote the both and missions? How can we start making teens think globally but act locally? The changes we make should change the DNA of our groups and the thinking of our teens. Nothing is more powerful a witness to a community than teenagers working hard to make that community better for the Glory of Jesus. It shocks the system of many people and encourages others to take notice and ask questions.

How can we as Youth Pastors/Leaders step up and change the way we've done missions and become missional minded people? Remember, the way this generation thinks about missions will be how they act as adults...so its more than the "now" we're effecting...we're effecting tomorrow too!

Student Leadership- It's Important!

2010-09-15T09:25:00.000-07:00

Youth Ministry has been going through a big identity crisis recently.

I'll say it has less to do with "Youth Ministry" and more to do with "Youth Pastors". We've all been watching the generations change and seeing that they need different stuff in order to connect with or even hear about the Gospel of Jesus. In the past 10 years, there have been different approaches and several different ideas as to how to fix the growing angst against formalized youth groups. Many approaches have been tested, weighed and found wanting (that's from A Knight's Tale BTW). Youth Pastors have seemingly tried everything and found themselves still being ineffective or slightly effective at best.

When it comes to the paradigm discussion, I feel like few have gotten it right, with the exception of a couple, like Mark Oestreicher in his book Youth Ministry 3.0, where he expounds upon the shifts in youth ministry and why the older models are failing. To see my 3-part review of this book go here: Youthmaster-Mark Oestreicher.

However, a new thing, which isn't really a new thing is coming into view for more and more youth pastors: Student Leadership is what should drive the ministry. Part of the old model (Youth Ministry 2.0) as Marko calls it; is this myth that it's all about the youth pastor.

"He's the one being paid, so he must do all the work." Is a myth that many of us have bought into which has been perpetuated to us from our: Senior Pastor, our parents, our church board and sometimes from our leaders. When we follow along with this type of ministry it gets dangerous. We begin to burn out, we begin to offend our leaders and worst of all, we begin to push teens away.

We must insist on Student Leadership, they must OWN the ministry they are part of so it can stop being a show for them and begin to be training for missional living. The youth team I am a part of has started to really recognize this piece of youth ministry and has begun to make strides to put a lot of the ministry in the hands of our teens.

I am blessed to have a Director who sees God's vision for our teens and is leading us down this path. The idea of student leadership wasn't on my brain...I had fallen back into the Youth Ministry 2.0 model and made it all about what I could do, but he has re-directed my thinking and re-sold me on the need for student leadership.

During this time of understanding student leadership and it's importance, I got an email from Leadertreks about student leadership which contained a free e-book written by Doug Franklin, President of LeaderTreks on Student Leadership. The title is Student Leaders are Church Leaders. I have read this book and believe it to be a great manifesto for student leadership. It provides reasons for student leadership and tools to begin handing the ministry over to them.

Once teens own something, truly own it there is no telling how far they can make it go with the power of the Spirit of God within them. I am excited to be able to offer the link to the FREE e-book, which is below. I know the team I am a part of as well as myself personally will be wrestling with these principles laid forth in this book as well as the idea of Student Leadership in general...will you join me? Because Student Leadership- It's IMPORTANT!

http://leadertreks.org/studentleaders-churchleaders.html

Youth Ministry Linxus

2010-09-03T06:30:00.000-07:00

Links, links Links! I recently got an email that had on a link to a great blog...which had links!

All of these links are super sweet and have good Youth Ministry content. I copied and pasted the notes and links from HERE to show you some really cool links!

Some of these guys, if you've been in youth ministry for awhile you will know already, but this list has got some newer ones as well!

10 Great Blogs for Youth Ministers

The best ideas are often inspired by seeing someone else in action. That’s often especially true in youth ministry, where one minister’s approach will spur another to think outside the box, which in turn pushes another to look for new ways to engage with their students. With that in mind, here are ten great blogs for youth ministers, full of personal experiences and ministry insights.

1. More Than Dodgeball

Joshua Griffin serves as the high school pastor at Southern California’s Saddleback Church, home of pastor Rick Warren. His blog features books and podcasts for students and ministers, as well as general posts about life and culture. Includes helpful links to books and other media.

2. Rethinking Youth Ministry

Rethinking Youth Ministry is run by a pair of youth ministers in the Christian Church (Disciples of Christ) in Missouri, with one based in St. Louis and the other in Columbia. Their bio says that they’re “passionate about rethinking ministry with youth from a progressive Christian perspective.” The blog focuses on helpful ways to get teens involved with each other and with ministry, as well as how to avoid pitfalls that plague a lot of ministries.

3. 100 or More

As its name implies, this blog targets leaders of youth groups with more than 100 members, since working with that many kids can often present logistical challenges that smaller groups don’t have to worry about. You can also follow author Jeff Maguire on Twitter.

4. Serial Youth Pastor

Chris, a youth minister in Iowa, blogs about his work with students as well as the way issues of faith and spirituality pop up in modern culture.

5. Confessions of an Average Youth Minister

Shane, a youth minister in Alabama, grew up in a conservative Baptist church but now works at one that is “much more open to new ideas and new ways to express our love for God.” His confessional approach highlights his fears and worries as well as his successes, which can be helpful for ministers who are worried that they’re the only ones struggling with a particular issue.

To see the final 5, go here: http://www.christiancollegesanduniversities.com/blog/2010/10-great-blogs-for-youth-ministers/

Implimenting Small Groups

2010-08-30T11:25:00.000-07:00

I may be a young guy but I’m not so young to think I’ve invented the small group idea. Nor do I think that what I’m going to say will shock you so much that you break down like a charismatic and start convulsing on the floor. I do think however it’s worthwhile to share what God has done recently in my world so that my story in turn may be a helpful one for you in your context.

In August I moved from a small church to a big church. My old Youth Group tapped out at 50 kids and now in my new position, I find myself in a Youth Group triple that size. In my old ministry, small groups were where it was at. We would take a group of teens and hash out the message and really work on it. It was a system that worked both for growth and outreach; it created a sense of ownership of the lesson/sermon (whatever you choose to call that thing where we talk up front to the teens) for the teens. It cultivated an atmosphere of authenticity and a wrestling I never experienced before with teenagers! This system was effective with Middle School and High School alike.

Shortly before I moved church positions I read a book by Marko (Mark Oestreicher) called Youth Ministry 3.0 in which he celebrates and encourages Youth Groups to “Grow Small”. The small group paradigm that we set up did just that because it forced people to be in more intimate groups; groups in which each person belonged and had something to bring to the group. Marko’s book inspired me to go into my new position “thinking small”, so you know what I did? I set up the same small group paradigm in my current (significantly larger) ministry that I had in my older (smaller) ministry.

When I brought the idea to my Ministry team, they said: “We’ve done that before. In fact we do it once a month.” My new leaders thought I was crazy to have our students (which are Urban teens) get into small groups and discuss the lesson/sermon. Most thought it wouldn’t work, many scoffed and said: “It’s gonna be bad” and others said: “We can try it, but let’s not be too hopeful.”

I felt compelled to jump in and do it. I developed the small group questions 12 weeks ahead of the talks, I worked hard and fast to push the students into the small groups. I encouraged our leaders, got approval from my ministry team and made a big change quickly.

Taking this plunge has paid off in many ways. I will be the first to admit that some of our teens still struggle to remain on topic and some honestly dip out of small groups altogether. However, I have seen some significant things happen during these small group times. These teens have discussed things that are going on deep inside of them that in the larger group could’ve never happened. Allowing this time also helped our leaders develop more meaningful relationships with the kids; they weren’t just there as police anymore (as they sometimes feel), they had a meaningful role in the shepherding of these teens…urban and suburban alike. The leaders began to see the importance of these small groups and have enjoyed discussing the lesson/sermon in more depth.

I am not saying: “Copy what I do” but I must agree with Marko that thinking small is where we need to start moving as Youth Pastors…this I have found is powerfully and effectively done through the small groups, both in a smaller church setting and now in a larger church setting.

For too long we youth pastors, (myself included) have been obsessed with numbers. We’re guilty of manipulating kids to help “grow the numbers”, yet we miss a gigantic part of our calling: Discipleship. When we worry about the numbers and “getting kids saved” we aren’t fulfilling discipleship, we are simply using our influence to make people come to Christ (which if we look deeper probably wasn’t a true conversion even though we count it in our numbers).

This isn’t to say that I’m against evangelism, because I’m all for it, we just need to then disciple these teens and we need to bring Jesus to them in such a way that it’s authentic and not fake. I feel that this is best done in the “small” rather than the “large”.

So, now how do you go about implementing small groups in your context? Here are some helping thoughts to get you on your way.

- Know your context- get to know how your kids interact best in smaller settings. Should you do small groups the night of the talk? Should you do them another night? Should you do lesson-based discussions or something different? These are all questions you need to answer first

- Ask good questions- Yes or No questions are no good. Time needs to be taken to craft thought provoking questions. If you design 5 questions and they’ve only gotten to answer 3, you’ve succeeded! If they breeze through the 5 questions and are picking their nose (or their neighbor’s nose) some work needs to be set aside in order to develop better questions.

- Think small- to quote Marko-“smaller is better.” Try to force smaller groups and not always stay large. Also concentrate on being small, not “growing larger”

- Train your leaders- This is where I need work. Our leaders need our help to guide them and show them how to be good question askers and good discussion guiders. This is on us to help them improve

- Be Ahead- in order to be effective with small groups they have to be done with intentionality. It’s easy for us to “wing it” especially when we are 1 of 3 leaders…but don’t sell this short! Take time to blueprint out your lessons 2, 4, maybe even 8 weeks in advance. Then you have good questions and your leaders know where they’re going!

Getting Healthy Feedback

2010-07-22T12:52:00.000-07:00

One of the words that gives me the heebie jeebies is the word “feedback”. Most of the time when we here that word it’s probably because someone wants to give us bad feedback. We all have those moments of feedback. They look something like this: you just experienced a great event that went off without a hitch save a small hiccup in the middle of it; a girl in your group got a little hurt. Bad stuff happens, right? Well, as is usually the case, the parent of the girl asks to come to your office later in the week so they can “offer you some constructive feedback”.

For most of my time in youth ministry these types of situations are all I attached to the paradoxical word: “feedback”. However, recently I’ve seen a whole new side of that word, and it has heavily changed my perspective.

We as a team decided we would start requesting people in our ministry to do survey’s after EVERY event as well as once a year for our normally scheduled programming. We used a simple online tool that allows you to set up a survey tailored specifically to the events and programming you’ve been putting on. People can anonymously fill out the survey and turn it back in to us with their feedback (we use Survey Monkey).

At the idea of this new means feedback I was full of fear and trembling (you know that “holy fear” kind of thing?), yet I saw that this may actually have some merit. In the time since we began doing these surveys, several amazing things have begun to pop up.

First, our leaders feel more appreciated, heard and respected. Surveys enable them to own a stake in what we put together, as well as an amazing opportunity to be honest about how they feel about certain things. It also provides us (from their perspective) great insight into what bombed, what was awesome and some possible ideas for what we can do next time we offer that particular event or program. Second, our parents (who hold a bigger stake in the Youth Ministry than do the leaders) also felt more involved, heard and better communicated with.

Another new insight that we found was that we have been able to see with much more clarity our strengths, weaknesses, opportunities and threats (a.k.a SWOT). We can see what we do well so we can continue to improve those things. We also see where we are weak so we can build up better teams of people around us where we are weak as well as grow in the areas we need to personally work on. We can also see the things in our environment that are opportunities we can take advantage of (or things we are already taking advantage of) and lastly we can see the things that threaten what we do (like poor communication, which has been a constant feedback for us).

God has used these insights to challenge and grow us in ways we never would have been without the feedback we’ve been receiving.

So, how to get healthy feedback is simply putting some questions on a survey and asking leaders and parents to take it? Yes and no. I think the most important part of this healthy feedback thing is humility and the willingness to learn.

One of my mentors Doug Bortner once told me that in order for me to be a great pastor, I would need to work on some things and get some counseling in certain areas of my life. At first when he said that, I was ticked off! I began thinking: “what will people think of me, a pastor who needed counseling? This feedback is not what I was looking for when I asked Doug: “how can I improve?” Yet, it was the feedback I needed at that time. For 24 hours I wrestled, toiled and struggled about his feedback. Thankfully, after much discussion and encouragement from family and friends, I decided to heed his advice and I am the better for it!

I think we fear feedback because we don’t want to change or don’t think we need to change, but the fact of the matter is we can always grow and change in that growth. Will this getting healthy feedback also gain us some un-wanted, un-loving, just plain wrong feedback? Yes, it will. However, we must take this risk.

Asking in advance for feedback is always a great way to go about seeking healthy feedback. When we ask for people to feed us insight they feel valued, honored and respected. It also says to them: “I know everything I do isn’t always amazing, help me become better for you and for these kids”.

If we look at the Bible, we see tons of stories laced throughout Scripture where people got some healthy feedback. Probably the most famous story is that of Jethro giving healthy feedback to Moses in Exodus 18. Jethro sees all that Moses is doing for the people and asks him why he doesn’t delegate some of those responsibilities to other people. Moses displays a teachable spirit when he accepts the feedback and uses it to better himself (Exodus 18:24).

To get healthy feedback, we first have to be willing to hear it. Next we have to seek out the feedback of those who hold stake in our ministries (i.e. parents, students, our Sr. pastor and our leaders). Finally we need to ask God for the humility to add some of the feedback to what we do; in other words we may need to change things, delegate things or improve things we weren’t previously inclined to change, delegate or improve.

Gaining this healthy feedback will make us better pastors and will allow us to not get stuck in ruts we ourselves create. May we be like Moses by being teachable, humble people who willingly accept and readily offer opportunities for feedback!

Dealing with Conflict in Youth Ministry

2010-07-02T07:27:00.000-07:00

Sometimes in ministry we have things that pop up and those things cause conflicts. I for one HATE conflicts and sadly I try to avoid them as best I can...yet they still happen.

How do we handle this tension, especially with parents? How do we bring up things in the lives of their kids that we know they are completely ignorant of?

This was a question I had early on in ministry, back when Myspace was new and Facebook was only for college students. Myspace was home to much teenage craziness much like Facebook has today. However, with Myspace it seems there is more freedom to display ...body parts? more so than with Facebook and some of my teens took advantage of this "freedom".

One such student was a young, beautiful girl who was also an elders daughter. She displayed some body parts that should remain hidden and teased as if she were to reveal more. When my wife showed me the pictures, I was shocked that a young lady from the home in which she came could in fact take this step. I wrestled for days as to how I would approach it. Finally I took the young lady aside and shared with her that these pictures were not sending the right picture as to who she is.

She of course could care less what I had to say and asked why I was "creepin on her page and looking at them (the pics) anyways." I said "You're a friend of mine on Myspace and I was just browsing through your profile when I came across those pictures." I then asked her to take them down or I would speak to her father about the pictures.

Sadly, she didn't heed my advice and conflict was in my near future. How do you bring something like this up? How do you deal with this type of conflict...especially with an elder and his child?

Eventually I grew a pair and one Sunday went over to the elder and shared with him the situation. He of course was shocked, appalled and disappointed in his daughter. We set up a meeting for directly after church so he could see the pictures for himself and make a better judgment. When I was talking with him his daughter saw and knew what was up. She raced home after church and deleted the worst of the pictures...which I feared would spark more conflict with her father.

Once we got to my office, I opened up my computer and went to her Myspace page and sure enough, most of the raunchy photos were gone. However, some were left that her father was definitely not happy about. We discussed what may have brought these things about and how we can help his daughter through this process.

We eventually teamed up to share with her that the message she is displaying is one of a sexual being, rather than a human being. She was advertising herself as an open, easy sexual target and in the climate of the current culture, this was a dangerous ad to be putting up for sure. In the end, I think the message sunk in and the young lady took it to heart and eventually realized I wasn't out to "ruin her life" but that I cared enough to speak up on a potentially dangerous situation.

This story is one that always comes to mind when I hear the words: "Conflict in ministry" because it, for me was a difficult hurdle to jump over in my second year as a youth pastor. It could've gone much worse, the elder could've been in denial and charged me as a pervert for looking at pictures. The daughter could've deleted all of the photos and the elder could've called me a liar. Many scenarios "could've happened" but by the grace of God, the right scenario is what happened.

Conflict is hard to deal with. Sometimes its off to the side and other times it is in your face. My theory now is to simply do what God asks of me in every and all situations. Even though it hindered my relationship with that young lady for a time, I would do it again because I care to much for her as a person. I care much more for her Spiritual, emotional and physical well being than I do for our "friendship".

I love what I do, but sometimes the conflicts get huge and overwhelming...it's then I turn to a youth pastor friend to lean on, get encouragement from and pray with.

God has called us to this mission and we must be faithful to that calling, even through and in conflicts. Lean on your support systems of friends and the Lord and He will guide you in all truth through His Holy Spirit (John 16:13). Don't be afraid to face conflicts (speaking to myself here!) because its through conflicts that we and others grow...just make sure the Holy Spirit is in it...because if He's not...the wrong scenarios is 100% guaranteed to play out.

Youth Leader 101

2010-06-16T11:08:00.000-07:00

Some people have this weird idea that in order to be a youth leader you have to be this hip, cool, young, tattooed, earringed dude.

Some people believe that in order to be a youth leader you need to always be "up on what's happening" or you have to be at least young enough not to have kids their age...because who wants a youth leader that can be my mom, right?

These are all stupid misconceptions,and many people have a misconception as to what a youth leader is. As many misconceptions as one can think of for "what it takes to be a youth leader" can also be thought up of for "what the role of a youth leader is".

Some think that a youth leader is the kids best friend, someone who just chills with the teens and listens to their problems, but is to afraid to lead and guide them because they don't want to ruin the friendship...or stop being important to the teen.

Some think that a youth leader is a bouncer who stands at the door waiting for the kids they know messes up to mess up so they can chuck em out the door at first sign of mis-behavior.

Some think a youth leader is a person who shows up, comes to youth group and watches the kids have fun and they are simply a warm body who stands off to the side and watches the revelry of the kids. This also is a good way to make oneself feel good about "giving their time to the youth".

As previously stated, there are several misconceptions as to what a youth leader is and sadly we youth pastors should get the blame. If we have any of the above youth leaders within our ministry, we have failed to train them and we have failed to guide them towards what it is God has them here for. One cares for friendship over leadership, the other cares for discipline and justice over grace and mercy, and the last cares for good feelings over true depth of purpose. These choices were made and no one above them tried to steer them onto a new path...a better path.

I will be the first to admit I struggle with this as well...I need to train my leaders better and love on them more!

So, with all of that said: what the heck is a Youth Leader?

There are several things I could list but for me, this is a special person who has the ability to befriend and lead teens. Someone who engages the teens on their ground even when it's awkward. This person is someone who is sold out to Jesus Christ as well as the idea of making Jesus known.

A Youth Leader is a person who desires to see teens come to know Jesus as well as grow in their faith. This person has a desire to go deeper themselves with the Lord so they can then bring the teens deeper as well.

This person prays for the teens they work with. They play with the teens, they laugh with the teens, they worship with the teens.

A Youth Leader is not a sideliner at youth events but a playmaker. This doesn't mean I expect a leader to always play a sports game if they hate sports, nor always play an intellectual game if they prefer sports, but it means they engage. Youth Group is not meant as a social club for the adult leaders, but rather a place of ministering to the teens.

Again, these things need to be communicated from the Youth Pastor.

In one of my ministries, I didn't communicate well what I expected. I was young and all of the leaders I had were my age or younger. Week after Week, I had two of my youth leaders (one male, the other female) texting eachother during my talks. After about 4 weeks of this, I was ticked and asked them why they would think that was cool. They stated: "You never told us that we couldn't text during the talk." I promptly told them to not do it again and to their credit they didn't.

However, that experience taught me something: every expectation must be communicated.

I've decided that I'm going to start doing a "Youth Leader 101" training...which I have never done, so that the above thoughts on what I think a youth leader are can be communicated. I'm sure some will dispute my ideas of a Youth Leader and maybe they are a bit "strong" for a vounteer leader...but I feel in order to be effective in the life of a teen, these things must show up.

If we are just their friends and are afraid to lead, we don't take them anywhere. If we are a bouncer and only trying to get them to behave, we may say a lot of stuff, but it will fall on deaf ears. If we go to make ourselves feel good, the only person we help is ourselves. If we love teens but don't love Jesus, we take kids down the wrong path.

God can use ANYONE to be a Youth Leader, no matter your age, gender, ethnicity God can use you in the life of a teen. The question is: are we willing to do all that is required to be effective...this goes for youth pastors too...are we willing?

Discipline and Teens

2010-05-31T17:51:00.000-07:00

Being in youth ministry means that eventually we will run into disicpline issues. No matter what your particular context is...you've had to (or will have to if you're a 2 week noobie) deal with discipline.

If I were honest, this is one of my top ten most hated things in youth ministry. I wish it didn't even need to exist, but sadly it does and most of us hate it.

During the talk time is when most of the issues arise. Games, events and things categorized as "fun" usually don't get a lot of troublemakers in the mix...probably becuase those kids are actually doing what is "fun" rather than annoying the crap out of you with their junky behavior. Granted there will always be one (at least) who no matter where, no matter what there are issues with that student.

How do we handle these always in our face issues of discipline, respect and behavior? On the one hand we don't ever want to teach that Church and Christianity are a form of "Behavioral Modification" which sadly many youth ministries and churches alik have done causing a mass exodus of young adults. On the other hand there is a strong desire for the teens present not to miss out on what God wants to say to them...whether its an evangelistic message or a message that causes them to grow. When kids disrupt, it causes the whole crowd to miss out on the talk.

So again, what do we do? How do we handle this stuff? These questions have haunted me this year because it seemed that whatever we did it didn't work. Students would get kicked out, come back after they "served their time" and would then again get kicked out.

One thing I found was if/when you could get ahold of the home (be it grandma, mom, dad, or other guardian) the students would change their tune, for the most part. It was a tough year though so the ACAC Student Ministries Team is hitting the summer hard with ways we can improve our discipline and still make it a place where people of all backgrounds, ethnicities and the like can feel safe, comfortable and loved.

Below are a few ideas we're wrestling with in which we hope to impliment this coming school year. Feel free to comment or add your own ideas because we are looking at all things to improve this segment of our ministry.

1. Set up a booth and a notebook. Here we will have a leader at the booth so if/when a student gets kicked out it gets written in the notebook by the student. There will also be a line where they write in their home number. They will then be told to call their parent/guardian to inform them they are being kicked out. This will help us keep track of who got kicked out, how many times and will also give us the phone number to the family so we can follow up.

2. Re-train (or Train) Leaders to be more incarnational. We have GREAT youth leaders and I love them deeply, however sometimes they are afraid to engage with the students. This can be true in the game time and in the talk time. When leaders don't have at least a first-name relationship with these teens, they will not have ample respect from those teens, which in turn leads to defiance. I will be writing a blog on "Youth Leader 101" where I will put all the training we will be doing with our leaders on this subject and others

3. Set up a Prayer team. I believe in prayer! This year at the very end, I set up a time for leaders to come early and pray with me for the night. This will continue but we will also be asking our current prayer team to either make a new team just for Students or to engage in some heavy prayer for these teens (more so than previously done). This includes me praying more for them and the ministry. I am guilty of not taking these matters before God.

4. Hold strong to our system of the 6 R's.
            Respect the Leaders
            Respect the Property
            Respect Others
and if you don't comply with the above we will:
            Remind you that you're in the wrong
            Relocate you away from where you are
            Remove you from the program

   Although this has been in place, we have not written down boundaries of when to progress to the next step. No one has been on the same page and it causes issues. Some people (like myself) are a bit more gracious and let some minor things sldie. Others are heavy handed and come down really strong right away on things I percieve as minor. Getting on the same page will go a long way to healing some of the issues we have.

Well, that's the brainstorm...you got any ideas?

You've Got Questions week 6

2010-05-27T07:33:00.000-07:00

This was done a couple of weeks ago, but it was our Final week on "You've Got Questions" where we had the Middle School students ask any question they wanted!

This ended up being more of an "Apologetics" series but it was fantastic none-the-less. The teens really enggaged the talk time and were listening intently for 40 minutes. I would NEVER go that long normally (usually I speak for 15 min. tops) but in order to answer all the questions the teens asked I needed to take more time.

Like I said though the students were deeply interested in the content and were willing to sit through the explanations and the answers to their questions. I had leader after leader suggesting we do this again and one even said: "The whole year could've been a series like this!" So I think it went very well and I will consider doing it again! Below are the questions that were asked as well as the links to get the PDF of the answers and the WMV of the message as well, enjoy!

Did Jesus Have a Lover?
What is life all about?
Why do you (meaning Pastor Marv) Believe in Jesus?
Why does God sometimes test us in weird ways?
Why does the church teach perfection if we can never be perfect?

Week 6 PDF Download

Week 6 WMV Download (Audio)

You've Got Questions week 5

2010-05-13T12:12:00.000-07:00

This series has caused some of the most controversy of all series I have ever done.

I've had parents calling me asking me questions on why I've answered some of these questions the way I did. I even recieved a phone call today saying that some kids who were debating a Jewish girl in their class were taken to the office for being "intolerant" because they were telling the girl that "Jesus is the only way to get saved...you got to get saved!"

Although I am happy they've got the importance of Jesus, it's odd even though I shared in week 4 of the series not to argue with people. It is odd they were labeled intolerant when the teacher themselves opened up the debate for class discussion...

Even through the controversy, this series has been amazing. As of the writing of this blog, we finished our last week (week 6) last night and it was great! I'm a bit behind, so I am only posting week 5 right now. Below are the questions that were asked week 5:

Even though I believe in God/Jesus is it bad that I also believe in evolution/the process the earth was created opposed to Genesis?

Jehovah’s Witnesses are always going around to houses, why don’t we do that?

Did God really want some people to turn out different from all?

Do new born babies go to heaven?

Do Animals go to heaven?

What’s it like being with God or Jesus, why?

What would the world be like without Satan?

If God was Jewish, why are we Christian?

How Big was Eden?

Here is the PDF download of the answers, enjoy!

Week 5 PDF Download

Moving Up

2010-05-07T06:16:00.000-07:00

It's that time of the year again for Student Minstries...that time is: Transition time!

5th Graders are moving into the Middle School Ministry, the 8th Graders are moving into the High School Ministry and the 12th Graders are moving away for college or staying local moving into the Young Adult Ministry.

Things are changing, students are growing older and these transitions can be hard at times.

My personal context is as a Middle School Pastor mostly. I am on a Student Ministry Team where we are all part of the team and we all funnel in together, however, my primary focus is Middle School Students.

This means, I am sending off 8th graders and welcoming in 5th Graders! This is my first year in this particular context, so my first time really taking on such a big undertaking. We have over 150 new 5th Graders moving up and the pressure is on!

Our Children's Ministry does an AMAZING job and for some of these upcoming students, they've interacted with CM their whole lives, as have their parents (the whole life of their child that is)! They are stepping away from the familiar into the unknown world of Student Ministries. This can be scary for both the student and the parent. As I reflected on the seriousness of such a change, I realized that the best way to make this transition was not to wing it, but to actually have a Strategic Plan of Intigration!

Here is the overall strategic plan:

Tues. and Wed. May 11th and 12th During game time of Blast (our Middle School Mid-week event; it happens on Tuesdays and Wednesdays as does the CM mid-week event), I will head over to CM along with 2 middle school boys and 2 middle school girls to show myself, pump up the 5th grade Blast nights and to have the Middle School students share some of their Blast experience as well as Quest (our Sunday School) and Growth Group (our small group) experiences.

Tuesday May 18th- First 5th Grade ONLY Blast night. we will be welcoming the new 5th graders with great food as well as a quick game, and a quick talk. Throughout the night, I will be doing a “talking walk through” explaining aloud all that we normally do on a Blast night.

Sunday May 23rd - All of the Student Ministries staff will be visiting Jr. Worship 1st, 2nd and 3rd services to show our faces to the 5th graders and to engage on “their turf” along side of them. Also we will pump the 5th grade Blast nights, Growth Groups as well as Quest to get them in the “know” about what we are doing in SM. (The reason we are doing this mid-week as well as Sunday is because the crowds can be different. In our context more inner-city students show up for mid-week events and neglect Sundays. Sadly, some of our churched kids show up only on Sundays and negelect the mid-week events)

Tuesday May 25th- 2nd and last 5th Grade ONLY blast night. Here we will run a normal Blast, just like it will be when everyone is there together. We will also have a parent meeting during blast. Where the new 5th grade parents can come and get all the information they could download in one night. Scott (the SM Director) and I will be around so we can hang with both parents and the new 5th graders. We will do some Q&A with all of the parents and help them get acclimated to the change from CM to SM. Here, I also invited some of our Vounteer Leaders (who have kids) to mingle with the parents and be there to answer questions as well.

Let me note that most of the above has been Scott's strategic plan for YEARS. The only addition I put into it was the parent meeting along with the leaders mingling with them. I am so lucky to be a part of a plan that has been in action for years and has worked well at integrating the new 5th graders into our Ministry.

I hope some of these insights will help all of us as we together trudge along in the murky waters of change and transition

Get Outta My Face!

2010-04-30T10:58:00.000-07:00

I recently came across this great resource and felt compelled to share it with all Youth Workers, Parents and basically anyone that will listen to me!

I was asked to check this book out by the head of the Student Ministries department and so I dutifully did so. To be honest, I wasn't expecting much when I began reading this book. I thought I'd get a few good points, close the book and move on. I was however, pleasantly surprised by what I got.

The book opens up with the importance of presentation. A simple story from the Cosby Show illustrates that the best content, if not presented well will never be well received. The book continues with great content on how to go about presenting our communications better, seeking to know what our teen really wants underneath all the angst we see and also gives advice on things we must understand in order to connect with our teens.

From the idea of “quatements”* to the biblical understanding of who our teens are, this book covers a wide array of content that will most assuredly help us in our communications.

“…beneath the surface of actions and thinking are good desires that God has hardwired into teens. Teens will respond to adults who can identify these. A clear view of them will give the young person the energy to make changes, sometimes radical and rapid changes.” (Horne, 2009, p. 98)

I was so inspired by this book that I took it upon myself to review it and summarize the entire thing. I wrote up a chapter by chapter summary/review so our parents can use it as a tool right away with their teens. We also encouraged the parents to pick up their own copy here: http://www.shepherdpress.com/product.php?productid=16234

I highly recommend this book to you as well and I will at the bottom put a direct link to my review/summary so you can see for yourself just how good it is. I hope the time spent doing this will be rewarded by many people getting a chance to use the good, wise, Biblically sound advice that author Rick Horne has given us!

*“Quatements” are statements that are spoken somewhat like questions. To be effective, they must be sensitive to a teen’s thoughts, feelings, fears, disappointments, or frustrations.” (Horne, 2009, p. 82) An example of a good quatement is: “I give you the impression that nothing you do is good enough.” Said with gentleness and respect, but showing that you understand what they’re saying.

My full 12 page summary/Review

Here's how I summarized it for our parents:

Anyone who has a teen or has worked with teens knows that communicating with them can be very difficult, especially if emotions escalate. Many people have discussed this topic and have hashed out their own ideas. Recently, we came across a resource we felt was worth investing time into as well as worth mentioning to you. It is a book titled: Get Outta My Face! By Rick Horne and is in our opinion a good resource for parents as well as youth workers. It is a tool that helps us to see our part in communication and presents things to watch for as we own our side of communications.

You've Got Questions week 4

2010-04-29T12:51:00.000-07:00

We're journeying through a series called: "You've Got Questions". We asked the teens to write out questions they have about...whatever. We then compiled the questions, sought to answer them and then we shared our answers/advice/shoulder shrugs with the teens!

This week was week 4 and happened...last week! I've been a bit behind on putting this stuff up and have tons of blogs I want to write here on this page. However, this was a good week of Questions and feel compelled to share it with you before I share all my cool blogs.

Week 4 was mostly about apologetics and evolution. The questions asked were very well thought through and very much interesting to answer. As usual, below are the questions the teens asked and attached is a URL to get the PDF of the answers!

How do we know that Christianity is the right religion?
Where do evolutionists say life comes from?
How did evolution come to be?
What are some points that discprove evolution and point to Christianity?
How do we share our faith in school?

Again, like I said this was an interesting set of questions to answer. There was tons of discussion in between these questions. I can add the mp3 of the talk if you're interested...if you are, just comment below and I will add it in. Below is the URL for download of the answers.

PDF of "You've Got Questions" week 4

You've Got Questions week 3

2010-04-15T11:49:00.000-07:00

We're journeying through a series called: "You've Got Questions". We asked the teens to write out questions they have about...whatever. We then compiled the questions, sought to answer them and then we shared our answers/advice/shoulder shrugs with the teens!

I love this stuff because it's practical and it meets the needs of the teens. I have found them more engaging than ever before and I think it's because its content they asked about so they are invested personally!

Weel 3 was a nice vacation week for me, but the other staff (the High School Pastor, the Worship Pastor and the Student Ministries Director) stepped in and pulled off a GREAT Middle School week (thanks guys!)

The Questions asked this week were:

Is the World supposed to end in 2012?
People at school call themselves Catholic Christians, what do we call ourselves?
Why did Jesus instruct some people he healed not to tell about him?
Can you explain about the Giants in Gen. 6 “The Son’s of God”
If church and state are separate then why do science teachers teach atheism?
If people say we evolved from apes, what do they think we will evolve into?
How old is planet earth, really?
How long did it take God to create earth? Was it really a week?
Why do they allow us to do book reports on non-Christian books and not Christian ones?

I have uploaded the content in PDF format where you can find my answers and Bible verses based off of these questions. There was no recording this week, but the PDF is up and ready for download:

Week 3 Questions PDF

You've Got Questions week 2

2010-04-09T06:02:00.000-07:00

We're working through a new series called: "You've Got Questions". We asked the teens to write out questions they have about their faith, life, love...whatever. We then compiled the questions, sought to answer them and then we shared our findings with the teens!

I love this stuff because it's practical and it meets the needs of the teens. I have found them engaging like never before and I think it's because its content they asked about so they are invested personally!

It's been GREAT and this is the week two stuff. Below are the questions they asked, a link to the PDF of our answers as well as the talk itself. Hope it helps!

Questions asked for week #2

Why does God show compassion to sinners?
How did God take our sins?
Why did God do this for us?
Why was Christ’s death necessary?
Could God forgive more than once?
Why do I have to live a good life if I have already been saved?
Are Jehovah and Allah the same god?
Did God create cheese or was that just an invention of the good people in Wisconsin?

Some GREAT questions and a ton of fun to answer!

LINKS:

Week #2 PDF answers

Week #2 Mp3 talk

You've Got Questions week 1

2010-03-31T19:36:00.000-07:00

The New talk series we're running through is titled: "You've Got Questions" and I am super stoked for it!

What we did was we asked the Middle School teens to ask any question they wanted to about faith, love, God, Jesus...basically anything they had doubts about when it came to religion and church! What we got was heaps and heaps of questions.

We worked through all the questions and are going to take 5 weeks to answer (or admit we have no idea) to many of their questions. This was week one and here were the questions:

Why does God let bad stuff happen if he is Perfect and Good?
What color/race was Jesus?
Is God prideful when He asks us to worship him?
If God created the universe, did he put life on other planets?
Men wrote the Bible…How can it be written by the Holy Spirit?
How do we know the Bible wasn’t altered of changed?
Who do you Love? Do you love certain people?
What does it feel like to be dead?

We sought to answer these questions. Below you'll find a link to the Word document with the written manuscript of the answers given as well as a link to the talk itself. It was a good night and I'm looking forward to the rest of the series!!

Questions Week 1 Talk

Questions Week 1 Manuscript

Working with Inner City Youth

2010-03-25T19:22:00.000-07:00

I am an inner-city Student Ministries Pastor. I work predominantly with Middle School students. This past week has been tough.
My heart is to see these students (churched and non-churched) to grasp the depth of Christ's love for them, know Him and then in turn make Him known.

Working in an inner-city context is rough. You hear about friends dying, drugs being sold and pregnancies happening. My heart breaks for these kids. I love them and care for them deeply. I desire to see kids who would normally be hopped up on drugs, hopped up on Christ.

It is hard. Satan loves to stir the city. Satan loves to attack the city. The enemy wants to destroy the lives of these kids and they are letting him do it.

I am under no delusion that I am Jesus and that I can in fact save them from the sin they are in, save them from the pain they face or even save them from themselves. That's God's job. It is however my job to be a tool and a willing vessel for Jesus to do those things through me.

There are few books written about Inner-city Youth Ministry, fewer still about Inner-City Middle Schoolers.

There seems to be a disconnect with authority with these teens. There seems to be a lack of respect for adults and a hatred for rules. This becomes hard when you are trying to create a safe, loving environment. Students buck the system, rebel against the rules, push the authority and their goal seems to be to so ruin the authority that they can then do whatever they want.

With God's empowering grace, I will not budge, I will not break. I will continue to love, continue to care for and continue to preach His message to these hurting teens.

I've been lied to, cussed at, laughed at and disrespected but man do I still love these kids. I don't let them walk over me, they know the boundaries...yet they continue to push, continue to pull and continue to disregard.

I'm writing because its freeing for me. I'm writing because if I don't I may not let these things out.

I'm sad for these kids. I hurt for them. I want them to know Jesus...but I am not Jesus. I can not force them to come take a drink of His eternal waters. I can simply be a voice, a life and a guide to lead them to the well. They must decide to take the plunge.

I've only been in Urban Youth Ministry as a pastor (not including my intern days) for 7.5 months. I am not naive though in thinking this is the most pain I will feel. I know someday I will hear: "_____was shot and killed" or "______is in jail". This is not resignation to the bad things of the city, it's a reality. I will know a student who makes a bad choice that lands them in one of those places. My prayer it is jail, not death.

I love my job, but ministry takes a toll on your heart. Anyone who says that ministry is a breeze and won't cause pain either: hasn't been in ministry longer than a millisecond or they are in denial.

There is so much to say about inner-city youth ministry and I'm sure I will continue to write about it since it is my context now. I am lucky to have a 22 year veteran as my boss. A man who has heard both: "___has been shot" and "____is in jail". He knows the pain; he's lived it, felt it and probably even dreamt about it.

I am lucky to have his wisdom, his shoulder and his leadership, it helps.

Pray for the inner-city youth and pray for those of us who work with them. Satan wants to rip them away from Jesus and he wants to slay us for attempting to bring them to Christ.

Identity Week 4

2010-03-24T11:41:00.000-07:00

This is a long time coming, since this series has been over for about a month now...but I finally got around to posting this finale up here! This series was a great series in which to get the kids realigned with what their true identity is.

The world that swirls around todays teen is a world that desires to strip them of God's stamp on their lives and stamp them with many different types of Identities.

After we've seen what Christ has set us free from (Ephesians 2:1-9) we can then accept who we are (Ephesians 2:10).
Once we accept Christ in our lives, we become a new creation (2 Corinthians 5:17) and we can now live for Righteousness and die to our sins (1 Peter 2:24).

Week 4 of the Identity series was all about being an Alien in this world. Being different from the culture and world around us and allowing Christ to shine through our lives rather than conforming to the Identity the world desires us to conform to.

I didn't speak for week 4 of this series, I handed the microphone over to my boss: Scott Wakeley and he spoke about living as an alien in this world. Below is a link to the talk he gave as well as the link for the lesson handout for the entire series. I loved talking to teens about who they really are! I hope this helps.

Scott's Talk

Identity Series PDF

Teens and Sex

2010-03-17T12:22:00.000-07:00

Sex has been a hot button topic in youth ministry from the inception of youth ministry. The two are pretty much inseparable, because if you are dealing with teenagers, you are also dealing with their sexuality.

The sad truth is that this year is the first year in 10 that teen sex, abortion and pregnancy rates have swung up. From 1999-2009 they were slowly on a decline, however now they are inclining again.

Teens are re-defining what sex is to them and in so doing are engaging in sexual acts that to them seem trivial while in reality those issues are quite serious and really big.

One such issue is that of oral sex. Stats show that 54% of teenage girls from the ages of 15-19 have had oral sex. This number is conservative statisticians say because teenagers for the most part no longer define oral sex as sex.

One Canadian film maker decided to embark on a documentary studying teens and their sexuality. She dedicated years to research and relationship building in order to get an authentic view as to what’s going on with teens today in the area of sex. What she found has shocked many. She was recently interviewed by Good Morning America and here's a bit of what she said: "After four years researching for the documentary, Azam told "Good Morning America" that oral sex is as common as kissing for teens and that casual prostitution -- being paid at parties to strip, give sexual favors or have sex -- is far more commonplace than once believed. " (taken from website: http://abcnews.go.com/GMA/Parenting/story?id=7693121&page=1)

This is pretty shocking news: oral sex is as common as kissing among teens. The other shocking thing that Azam tells Good Morning America is that the most at risk teens for this type of behavior are the prettiest girls from the most successful homes. This is a far cry from what one may expect. Most people think that the most at risk teens for this type of behavior would be inner-city girls and boys, not the suburban "wealthier kids".

We've been talking about relationships: love, sex and dating in youth group this whole month and the things I've been studying (like this article above) have really opened my eyes to the sad reality of slipping morality among teens. The fact that oral sex is no longer considered sex is a dangerous road to travel down. Just 3 years ago, we had the inception of "sexting" which is the texting of either explicit pictures or explicit dialogue. Sexting has skyrocketed in popularity and has in my mind allowed for this new debased ideology of sexuality.

One of the things that ticks me off the most about this whole conversation is the new "teaching" that has been going around about teenagers and sex. One such new teaching is that teens are going to have sex anyways because they are so animalistic and can't overrule the urges within them. Let's teach kids how to have sex, offer free demos and then tell them freely to have sex, but be safe. They say to the kids: "you have urges and you must meet them, but do so with safety".

Now hear me, I agree that some students will choose to have sex despite anything told to them on the contrary and they must know how to be "safe". But to tell them to give in to the urges and have sex freely is just ridiculous! As a co-worker of mine said: "that's like saying I have an urge to have sex with 12 year olds and the government telling me to go ahead and "give into my urges" because I can't help myself.

I have been thinking about the implications of all this craziness about teens and sex and while thinking about it, I put up on my facebook status a question to what others think are prevailing issues when it comes to sex and teens. Here's what people said, with some thoughts from me in blue:

Tony Cosentino "How far can I go before it's considered sex. Basically what can I get away with before God calls it sin instead of how can I live so that I please God."

I think this issue undergirds the new explosion of oral sex. Teens Christian and non are re-defining what is and isn't "sex". If they say oral sex isn't sex, they aren't "losing their virginity" and are doing nothing outside of God's will. The boundaries are being pushed and pulled to fit a mold they like. Sadly, the world around them is trivializing such actions, and in some cases encouraging them.

Matt Salvesen "the pervasive sexuality of culture and the entire lack of almost any commitment tied to sexual acts."

I fully agree with Matt here! Americans spend more on porn then on Football, Baseball and the opera combined! (stat found in Driscoll's Vintage Jesus). American culture is steeped in sexuality. Also, Matt's second point is also true. Casual sex, friends with benefits are all pervasive in our world. Simply watch a show like Scrubs and you see two grown adults who don't want to even date let alone get married having sex and calling it casual. They just hook up and shack up until their real "love" comes along.

James Peterhoff Marvin, I think there are so many issues with this. I feel, first and foremost, that we have lost our regard for the beautiful thing that sex is meant to be. Instead, we have perverted it into merely another form of entertainment. Agreed

It's also another revelation of where idolatry sets in. People make an idol out of sex, out of acceptance (which means in order to be accepted they give into peer pressure), out of their other halves (the simple idol of the one you love), and out of power (it makes people feel strong when they have conquered so many sexually). We look at sex to fill our desires in a way that is selfish and meaningless to God when in fact we should fulfill them in regard to how God wants us to (creating in fact worship). The true meaning of sex and sexual intimacy has been perverted and lost in our current culture, I full heartedly agree.

I also think we have created a society where kids can no longer be kids. It is true that things such as this have been issues for teens forever, however; I feel that there is a pressure for kids to grow up way too soon. All the elements work against them remaining young and as such, we see these issues becoming more and more apparent in younger aged people as generations move on.

I agree here, but not fully. Kids do in fact have to grow up faster and this is largely because both parents are working and there isn't a stable home situation with either divorce or disengaged parents. This then makes the teen more responsible for themselves and independent. Also, on this note the educational system tells teens they need to be active in extra-curricular stuff as well as in all AP classes in order to have a chance in college. This pushes kids out into a competition they aren't really ready for. However, where I disagree is that even though they may feel "more mature" and "more responsible" it is in all reality a harsh mist blinding them from the inner workings of their own psychology. They may have adapted really well at young ages, but inside, to their core, they are still teenagers. They will think and act upon this reality, so when and if a teen pregnancy occurs, they are just as helpless as they would've been without these pressures. They have a façade of maturity, yet they lack the life skills able to handle such things such as sex.

Jillian McCaffrey I think one of the issues specifically concerning Christian teens and sex is that the church often creates a hierarchy of sins and sex is usually at the top as being the worst of the worst. This is not right. I think sometimes there is so much so much shame and condemnation put upon teenagers for having sex that they just try to deal with their ... See Moreissues on their own and keep them hidden when they should have a safe place to be open and honest about it. Instead of having to swallow their pain and pretend like everything is okay, teens should have a safe place to be vulnerable and open. The church should be one of these places. The church should be walking with them in their brokenness and pointing them toward the Father instead of ranking their sin.
I would say inside the church, this is the BIGGEST issue! This is such a big issue because when sex comes up in the church, there is usually a simple: no, don't do this because its bad, or because you may get AIDS or because I said so. Yet, these are NOT tangible reasons to keep teens out of having sex. They must know what the implications are physically, emotionally and spiritually. It must also be iterated that God doesn't say: "no sex outside of marriage" simply to hinder their fun, but because God created them and knows how they work best. They also as Jillian said need the freedom to talk about sex. If they are curious, they need a safe place where questions can be asked. Also, they (if they fail) need a place to be loved, encouraged and helped through sexual issues. The last place a person wants to go when they messed up is to the person who will say: "you are so dirty, you ugly sinner". They need a place to say: "yea, it hurts, you messed up, but God is a forgiving God and he can heal you from your pain".

Chloe Bovier (High School Student) I agree God intended sex too be a good thing as long as Teenagers are leaning it from the right people and not off the streets the topic is simple.
Today most teens view sex as a bad thing because they abuse it (not me) but if we look at sex for what it really is then I think that our generation will be a more equipped too face the world.
Not just for "church kids" but for everyone

This is the other side of the coin: people are afraid of sex. Sex inside marriage is wonderful! God created sex to be a beautiful dance between a husband and a wife. yet, when we debase sex to always "the naughty thing people do" it confuses the sexuality of teens and makes them look upon sex as a vile thing. This in my opinion is why a lot of Christian marriages are rocky in the beginning. The guy is all gung ho about sex and the girl is all scared to have sex because for 15 years she was told how bad it was.

There is so much more to be said about teens and sex. The stark reality is that with oral sex, casual prostitution (as mentioned in the above article), and sexting in high places of teen popularity we as a culture are in a dangerous place. I sadly predict that the teen sex rate, pregnancy rate and abortion rate will continue to climb unless we as a church, and society can again re-define sex for our teens.

Lastly, on my facebook a teen parent shared these articles and thoughts:

Rebecca Wimer For the physical reasons... if you haven't read/heard of the book HOOKED, you probably should read up on this aspect:
Radio show (listen online)
http://www.familylife.com/site/apps/nlnet/content3.aspx?c=dnJHKLNnFoG&b=3832113&ct=8023789...
Short article with some basics:
HOOKED: The Bonding Power of Sex
http://www.familylife.com/site/apps/nlnet/content3.aspx?c=dnJHKLNnFoG&b=3576499&ct=8061439
There is also a book called "HOOKED"

Makes me think of this provocative (true) article. Relates it to the culture in the church of "NO. It's bad."
SCARING THE SEX OUT OF YOU
John Seel turns a discerning eye on increasingly popular abstinence education programs...
Wisdom is the knowledge of God's world and conformity to it. Wisdom involves realism about nature and human nature. Discernment follows from this. Discernment is the ability to sort through the way we do things in a fallen world, evaluate it according to God's original design, and adjust our lives accordingly.
Thus there is a close connection between metaphysics and morality -- between how God made the world and how we are to live in it. Without biblical realism and cultural discernment -- we play the fool.
Take the well-intentioned movement advocating
abstinence in public schools. The Alan Guttmacher Institute reports that sexuality education focusing on abstinence has grown from 2% in 1988 to nearly 25% in 1999.
READ THE REST HERE:
http://www.ransomfellowship.org/pdf_critiquearchives/Critique_2001_08.pdf

Thanks Rebecca!

TALK, tell me your opininons, share your comments! Comment on friends!

Identity Week 3

2010-02-22T09:36:00.000-08:00

This past week, we ran through my favorite portion of the Identity Series!

We talked about how Christ sees us, what His word says to us and the truth that builds us up!

Many teens hear several lies about who they are and begin to attach their identity to what it is they've been told about themselves. Many teens turn to suicide, cutting and other such outward signs to reflect the inner turmoil.

Sadly a HUGE chunk of the inner turmoil can be produced by the words of other people and they listen to those lies while not knowing what God thinks and feels about them!

This reality breaks my heart. Students who have lived a mere 12 years already hate themselves and look at the world with synical eyes. However, Jesus says they are not who they've been told they are!

These teens have little to no reality that Christ made them and loves them. Even teens growing up in the church have an "idea" but don't yet have the tools to deny the lies said of them.

In this week, we learned that we are all created in the Image of God (Gen. 1:27), We are God's POEM (Eph. 2:10) and We are NOT and accident (Jer. 29:11). God who writes our poem desires us to be of the family of God, accepting Jesus as our Lord and Savior!

Like I said, this is my favorite talk to do on Identity! Below is the link to the PowerPoint and talk as well as the talk recorded. Hope all this stuff helps!

Identity Week 3 Talk

Identity Week 3 PowePoint

Identity Week 2

2010-02-04T10:04:00.000-08:00

This week, we talked about Identity Theft. We opened up with a scene from Bourne Identity, in which Jason Bourne is looking in the mirror and asking himself who he is.

I then gave a person (silly) story of when I thought I could be Batman...then I pooped my pants and realized...I could never really be Batman.

Teens, whether they realize it or not are looking for their Identity, and this all goes back to the beginning. When God made man, he made known their Identities...they walked with him, talked with him and lived life alongside of God.

Then the Deceiver came in the midst and confused Adam and Eve into giving up their known Identities to seek out a "better" one. After the fall, they run from God, and try to cover themselves with new clothes. Their Identity was stolen...and so was ours.

It breaks my heart to see teens seeking and "finding" their Identities in destructive (and non-destructive) things rather than in God.

This week, I shared with them the ID theft that Satan caused and how they too need to find their identities.

Ephesians 2:1-3 discusses what life without Christ (the supplier of our Identity) looks like. We give ourselves over to things that don't last and attempt to seek out who we are within those things. However, Ephesians 2:4-9 gives us the good news that because of Christ, we no longer have to look to fading things for our identity, but we can look to the eternal Christ to give us our true identities!

Here were my main points:

1. We look to the world for our Identity rather than to God

2. We do this because the deceiver wants us to lose our true identity

3. Without Christ, we are dead because out identity was stolen

4. Because of Christ's death, we don't have to lose our true identity

If you are interested, below is the talk, the talk link, the Bourne clip and the Power Point. Hope you are able to use them!

Identity Theft Talk

Identity Theft Power Point

Identity Week 1

2010-01-27T18:47:00.000-08:00

We just finished week 1 of the Identity Series! At my church, we have a Student Ministries Staff of 6 people, each of us each week brings our talk outline and we discuss how we can change or make it better. God used this time to have me change some cool things and add some interactive pieces I probably wouldn't have normally bring to the table.

We started the talk time by having the teens split up into 2 teams and get together to draw two people who they would give and Identity to on giant poster boards. They took 5 minutes to draw and write up an Identity for their characters. At the end of 5 minutes, I re-gathered everyone and had a rep from each team describe their person.

The students described their persons identity by: hair color, occupation, material possesions, wealth and so on.

I then jumped in with saying this: "You all became creators just now. You took a blank page and made something out of nothing, where there was no one, you made someone. God has done the same with us! He created us out of nothing and made us something. The Bible talks about this scene in Genesis 1."

The lead in idea was a group effort. The team I am a part of each week looks at everyones talks for the whole week and adds input and takes stuff out where they feel it is needed. The drawing idea was a group idea that caused us all to think outside of our boxes and come up with something. I love/dislike this because I changed my whole talk (as you will see from the outline) yet came up with something much better.

Moving on with Identity: I made two points that I wanted to hit home;

1. Realize we were made by God, for God
2. God is the supplier of my Identity

We looked at Genesis 1:27-31 NLT and discussed how God made us male and female and how we are Good to him! He has the blueprints on us and knows us better than we can know ourselves and to Him, we are good!

Below I have the BlueFishTV video we showed, as well as the talk on mp3 if you're interested in the other stuff I said. Also, I have the links to both the Series outline and the Power Point for week 1.

Identity Series Outline

Identity Week 1 Power Point

New Series: Identity

2010-01-18T10:35:00.001-08:00

Middle School students (i.e. early adolescence) have three main struggles (these are Mark Oestreichers and Scott Rubin's findings...guys who freaking ROCK at Middle School Ministry! These are listed on page 152 of their book: Middle School Ministry):

- Identity: "who am I?"

- Autonomy: "How am I unique?" and "What's the extent of my control?"

- Affinity: "To whom and where do I belong?"

God has laid it on my heart to go about working on these specific pieces of their adolescent struggles through my talks/small groups during our weekly meetings as well as during our Sunday school hour. Not only these three specific pieces but also doctrinal pieces such as "Who is Jesus?" "What is the Trinity?" and "Who is God?".

We've worked through the Affinity (iBelong) piece as well as the "Who is Jesus?" piece so far this year, now it's time to go through the Identity piece getting a close on the question: "Who am I?".

This has been a fun series to put together, but tough. I first started it as a 4 week series, but felt compelled to add a 5th week (which appears in the packet as week 4). I hope it has the same impact as the "Old Skool Jesus" series has had on our teens. It is a series replete with the Word of God and bases our Identity on who God says we are!

I have uploaded the whole series as I did the the "Old Skool Jesus" series. I also uploaded the iBelong series, which I neglected to do before. Below are the links to download the talk outlines and I will post the links for the downloads that the series requires. Enjoy!

Identity download

Old Skool Jesus download

For the iBelong series, it was my first time going from pages to PDF so I exported each week...sorry :(

iBleong #1 download

iBelong #2 download

iBelong #3 download (I created this but did not use it, since I used Zacchaeus in the "Old Skool Jesus" series instead...he fits in either really but since I made it, you can download it if you want)

iBelong #4 download

Thanks for taking the time to check these out! May God bless us in our efforts to reach teens for the Glory of His name!

Old Skool Jesus #10 and #11

2010-01-15T08:25:00.001-08:00

We are definitely nearing the end of our Old Skool Jesus series, which makes me a bit sad since we've been having so much fun...but se la vie, no?

Old Skool Jesus #9 got wrapped into the "Save Christmas, Save the World" theme, so you can re-catch that here: "Save Christmas, Save the World"

Old Skool Jesus #10- Jesus Style Ministry (Zach) Luke 19:1-9
We all know the story of Zacchaeus and the song that goes with his short stature, but he was more than just a "wee little man". So many times we get caught up in the fact that we've "heard that story so many times" so we don't look for new angles to teach the "played out stories" from. Jesus made a significant statement as to why He came in this section of Scripture. Zach was a hated guy, considered a traitor, unclean and unwanted. Jesus stepped over cultural boundaries, man-made laws and fopaus in order to reach out to a unloved, rich, short tax collector. Zach had such a strong desire to see Jesus that he was willing to further disgrace himself (and he was probably made fun of) by climbing a tree just to get a GLIMPSE of Jesus. Jesus then did the unthinkable and went to Zach's house and announced it to the public that that's where he was going. This was a BIG deal, in fact it was upwards to being scandelous! Jesus, a learned rabbi was going to spend time with someone his culture considered: unclean, unloveable, a nasty scoundral, a traitor and a thief.

Two things we notice in this story besides the scandal of it all however is that 1. The mere presence of Jesus changed Zach and 2. Jesus describes he came to "Seek and save that which was lost" (Luke 19:9). He shares with us that His style of ministry is to reach the unlovely, love them enough to be with them and then watch how the Presence of God transforms them!

I challenged my teens in how they can seek the unlovely in their schools, I gave an example of a kid that was hated in my school and how a friend of my challenged he and I to hang out with this guy. In the end he came to church, he didn't accept Christ, but at least the Lord planted a seed in his life.

Old Skool Jesus #11- Jesus Style Ministry (Samaritan Woman) John 4:1-28
I didn't teach this one to the teens, because I gave the floor over to my collegue in ministry: The High School Pastor. He broke them into groups that they wouldn't normally be in. He said: get into a group with people not from your own: race, background, school or someone you comepletely just don't know.

He then asked them to share something small they can remember being guilty about. They ended up talking about some things and after about 4 minutes, he brought them back to the front. He then told a time where he remembers feeling extremely guilty (and it was quite funny). He then talking about the Samaritan Woman and how she too felt guilty about her past. After his little intro, he showed a clip from the movie "the Gospel of John" that had the whole story of the Samaritan woman.

The thing to notice about the Samaritan woman is that she was even more hated than Zach. was. She was #1 a hated Samaritan of whom never talked to Jews and visa versa; she was #2 a Woman and #3 a notoriously dirty woman to the people she lived near. She went out to get water at noon, which is the hottest time of day because she was guilty, ashamed and didn't want to deal with people because of her lifestyle.

This is not a person a Jewish rabbi would even encounter, much less talk to! Here again, Jesus goes across several boundaries to reach out to someone who is unlovable, or even hated. The message Corey gave was that because of this encounter, the Samaritan womans life changed! After she hung out with Jesus, she began to talk to people, and share that he had told her everything about herself. This womans wittness changed because she encountered the real Christ! It was a cool point to make.

Next week is "He-Man Jesus" and the close of our 12 week series on "The Old Skool Jesus". After that we begin our study on Identity, which is deeply rooted in the Word and I will make available the whole series here, as I did with the Old Skool Jesus series. Here again is the downloadable packet for this series: "Old Skool Jesus PDF"

Below is the video I shared with the teens for the Zacchaeus lesson.

Deep Teaching

2010-01-14T12:04:00.000-08:00

My last post on my Thoughts on Deep Teaching to Middle School got my mind thinking about how I teach and the level I go to when I teach.

If you know anything about me, I love to preach, teach and communicate. It's the thing that gets me up in the morning, the thing that excites me most about ministry...so how do I teach to youth?

As I fought for significantly in my previous post, I am a proponent of deep teaching, even to Middle Schoolers. I was reading Total Church the other day and came across this quote that resonated with my heart for deep teaching:

"It's easy to suppose that attractive activities are the key to successful youth work. It is easy to suppose that the corresponding measure of success is weekly attendance. But God does his work through his Word. The Key to successful youth work is the Bible. This is how God does his work in young people. And the measure of success is not attendance but gospel fruit in their lives" (Total Church pg. 184)

This is a rough quote, because its true. Our teaching must be rooted in the Word of God in order to meet the needs of our teens! So many times we simply try to make topics of teaching and sadly instead of going deep in the Word to do so, we end up spouting feel-good platitudes and statements like: "don't have sex" without any real Biblical emphasis behind it.

There are plenty of Scriptures about abstinence, teach from them.

The Bible has a Word for every situation! I love youth ministry and I love teenagers so we must give them the richest meat possible. I'm not saying I do this all the time, I fall short too, I'm not trying to be a judgemental legalist, I'm simply saying what I've been convicted of myself and sharing that I think its not just me, but everyone that needs to hear this message.

Our Teens are craving deep truth from deep teaching, by the Power of the Holy Spirit, let's give it to em!

Thoughts on Depth of Teaching to Middle Schoolers

2010-01-07T12:04:00.000-08:00

Middle School ministry as a whole gets a pretty bum wrap. Most youth pastors I know with an exception of a few prefer High School ministry over Middle School. In fact, most churches are set up where the High School pastor is the head of the Youth Min. department and the Middle School pastor is waiting to “climb the ladder”. The belief is that the hierarchy is normative and that most people want to move out of Middle School ministry.

When I asked myself why this could be and asked others why they thought this could be, one resounding answer came coming to the forefront: depth of content. I myself said when I moved to my position as Middle School pastor at ACAC: “I’m a bit sad that I won’t be able to go as deep with them as I could my High Schoolers in Nyack”.

The reality is that with most topics this is true; however, we can go deeper with Middle School students than most people think.

Middle School students now a days are dealing with things only adults dealt with approx. 50 years ago. They are faced with: gangs, sex, drugs, violence, broken homes, dead-beat dads, awful school expectations, horrible living conditions and that’s just the beginning of the list. These issues can run deep and they cause the Middle School students to grow up faster than before.

If we skirt issues with Middle School students like sex, sin and fatherless-ness with pithy, easy to understand topical talks we can seriously miss our window of opportunity with these students. We can teach: real, honest truth to these teens without watering it down like we so often do.
When I got older and learned more about the Bible I was hurt that when I was a young kid, my Sunday school teachers missed huge pieces of teaching. I found many things different than what I was taught and false…all because they wanted to water stuff down and make it “easier” to understand.

Middle School students are hungry for depth, hungry for knowledge, hungry for acceptance, hungry for discussion yet we aren’t giving them the strong food they need because we fear they won’t get it…or much worse…we can’t teach what we don’t know.

Sadly, I have noticed many a youth pastor being complacent with their studies, neglecting their Bibles and neglecting to read any other books. I am not saying I am much different but I am convinced we must all read more, study more and go deeper ourselves.

Off of that soap box…Middle Schoolers deserve deeper teaching than we’ve previously given them. I know you may scoff at this but we can teach them doctrine, we can indeed teach them the deeper truths of the Bible and…they will get it! I am convinced we as youth pastors have shortchanged Middle School ministry for too long. They are not the annoying, painful, low level group of kids so many people box them into being. They are deep, vastly intuitive teenagers who need to be challenged. As I’ve prayed about what God desires for me to do with the Middle Schoolers he has entrusted to me, this truth has hit me over and over again: going deep with them is what they need!

After all, the gods they worship can’t compare to Christ! He is the only God who can save them from their junky lives and make them new creations!

Christmas Ideas for Youth Ministry Pt. 3

2010-01-03T05:35:00.000-08:00

I know this is EXTREMELY late, but I was given a weeks vacation for Christmas and decided to not be distracted by trying to have an "online" presence.

The Night went amazing on December 23rd! We had over 150 people there and 11 youth raised their hands to recieve Christ for the first time!

We played several fun games and had some great activities.

The Games:

a. Human Present Relay (2 ppl from each section will be wrapped up like a present)
b. Santa Pants Relay (progressive relay with 5 people from each section)
c. Tree Decorating (each table has a chance to win a prize…best dressed tree in 5 min. wins) d. Total Recall (video with 4 segments, memory questions after each segment…team that wins each wins a bag of snickers!)

Then we headed upstairs for the talk. Here is my (small version) talk outline:

TALK:

Intro with a story about an old lady who never used her electricity except to light her candles

-We do the same silly thing with Christmas, we neglect to turn on the lights to it’s true meaning, getting more excited about how it serves US rather than what it even stands for

- Read Philippians 2:5-11

- When Christ came that Christmas morning, he gave up heaven for a smelly animal stall. He gave up a throne for a manger. He didn’t come so we could get all excited about a fictitious fat guy who gives presents to good little boys and girls, he came for something much more important than that

- When Christ humbled himself to be born next to stinky smelly animals, he was choosing a lesser life than any normal king. His whole life was one not to be desired. He was poor, teased, his momma was talked about and he came to serve you and me to death.

- Christmas is about the best idea, the most meaningful birth in all of history, it’s so important that our calendar is dictated by the event!

- Christ was born so that he could humble himself to death, even death on a cross. It is the greatest gift in all of history, will you accept it?

Give a time for response

To open the night, we decorated cookies, had some good hot food and hot coco! Right before the games we opened up with our: "Save Christmas, Save The World" Part 3 Video! Below is that video!

Christmas Ideas for Youth Ministry Pt. 2

2009-12-22T05:38:00.001-08:00

Previously, in my Christmas Ideas for Youth Ministry post, I shared the things God was speaking to me about this season and how in turn I was going to share it with my Middle Schoolers.

We put together a funny story line to promote and brand the evening. Video one is on the post link above, as well as here: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ODrbM4QVTFk

During Christmas, we can all be very self-serving or self-seeking, even myself. I remember when I was a senior in HIGH SCHOOL at the age of 18 and I made Christmas all about myself.

I had gone out and purchased DVD's for my whole family. They had some great DVD choices on their lists, so I bought all of them DVD's that year. As I sat there contemplating wrapping them, a great idea struck me: I haven't seen these movies, and here they are, I can watch them all without renting them! Afterall, I just bought all of them!

So, I did what camae to my mind: watch the DVD's, THEN wrap them.

Christmas was akward when everyone opened up their DVD's and noticed that the security tape was gone as well as the plastic wrap that so lovingly covers the DVD cases so the puchaser (or reciever of the gift) can know beyond a doubt it's brand new.

The jig was up. I tried to come up with a good lie like: "That plastic wrap and the security tape is just a pain, so I took the liberty of taking them off for you" but I had no such ability to lie. I confessed my sin and have been reminded of it often...

That story of my life is how in a lot of ways each of us approaches Christmas. We take the power out of it and turn the lights off to our understanding.

This year's theme is: "Turn on the Lights. Save Christmas, Save the World". Next week, I will share my talk here on the blog. For now, enjoy episode 2 of "Save Christmas, Save the World"!

Old Skool Jesus #7 & #8

2009-12-09T08:45:00.000-08:00

Old Skool Jesus week 7- Why Should I Worship Jesus

We as humans are created to worship. It is in our very nature to worship something or someone. I shared with the Middle Schoolers that whether they like it or not, they are worshippers. I shared a quick little illustration where I asked them to think about countries where they worship idols made of wood, gold or whatever. I asked them, "If you walked into their world and saw them bowing down to a wood idol that had three weirdly carved faces, what would you think?" Most said they'd think it was funny, and weird that these people were worshipping a piece of wood. They said they'd feel a bit weirded out and want to laugh.

I then asked them another question: "What would those people think, if they came to America and decided to go to a Pittsburgh Steelers game?"

They instantly and collectively said: "AHH, they'd think we were worshipping the Steelers!"

I was overjoyed at how they instantly connected the two. I shared with them that we worship or "give glory to" many things. We shout out praises to teams, we spend money on clothes, we love movies and such. One sign I recently read from Wendy's said: "Love the egg, Love the bicuit, worship the bacon". Because even Wendy's gets that we must worship something.

Of all the things in life we could worhsip or give glory to, what makes Jesus worthy of our praise? Why should we worship Jesus?

The answer is very lengthy, but also very short. Jesus is, was and will be God! Jesus came to this earth as a King but lived the life of a poor traveling preacher and for the first 30 years of hus life had the hands of a blue collared worker, even though he was worthy of never having to work a day in his life!

We sacrifice so much of ourselves to things that aren't worth our worship! We bow down to sports teams, we bow down to money, we honro, scream out loud for video games, movie stars, we give over to sex, drugs and fame as things that will be worshipped by us.

The truth is, they will all leave us dead and dry in the end. Jesus is the only thing in this world that will never leave us. Anything and anyone else will disaapoint us, because we'll always want more things and we'll always want a better friend, or something just more than what we have. With Jesus, He is enough, He is all we need! That's why we should worship Jesus!

I showed a silly video from Bluefishtv about a "worship guy" who was "worshipping God" but in reality he was worshipping Chicks!

Old Skool Jesus week 8- Jesus---The Right Way

Don't all roads lead to God in the end anyways? I'm in church, but people say god is god and they all lead to the same place. What's the difference about Jesus? Some sections of the "New Skool" of Jesus followers in todays culture would tend to say that universilism is a good avenue, however the Old Skool Jesus clearly says that he is the ONLY way to Heaven. John 14:6 says: "Jesus answered 'I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me."

Jesus made no bones about salvation. he said he is THE way, THE truth and THE life. It's only through Him! Other religions lead up mountains to be sure, but they are all different mountains, not the same! Dan Kimball in his book They Like Jesus But Not the Church on pages 180-181 has a great illustration of these two modes of thinking.

Some religions lead to you being the god of your own planet (Morman), others say that only a certain number of people if they are just good enough will reach the Father, but its all in how you live (Jehovah's Witness), still others say there are many gods and goddesses and obeying them and doing good to them will make them happy enough to reincarnate you (Eastern religions). All are different means to completely different ends.

Jesus is the Right way because 1. He claims to be the ONLY way; 2. He made a way FOR us and it isn't contigent upon us.

All religions besides Christianity are about what YOU DO for the gods. Christianity is about what GOD DOES for you. He made the way, because we are not good enough to make our own. God loves us enough to make a way.

Christmas Ideas for Youth Ministry

2009-12-08T10:49:00.000-08:00

Christmas always seems like a tough time of year to get lessons and stuff off the ground. In a sense it's easy because you know the topics, you know the stories, but it consistently comes to the point that you feel like you say the same thing over and over again.

We as youth pastors also have a tough time as to make this timeless truth timely and relevant to the lives of our students.

I've been developing some cool things that I hope will help you along your journey this Holiday Season. I took a break from Old Skool Jesus posts (which will resume tomorrow, with a double portion!) so that I could share this stuff with you.

As I sat down to think about this season, I asked myself what do these Middle Schoolers need to hear about the Christmas message? Some things came to mind: Jesus is "the reason for the season" type stuff, Drop materialism, seek God this Christmas...all of those ideas came. however one thought was pervasive: Christmas and the reality thereof is shrouded in darkness. The true heart of Christmas has been darkened by the evil one...we must turn on the light to our teens understanding about Christmas.

It isn't just about telling nice pretty stories about Jesus and Mary or the Wise men and the Shepherds, it about Turning the Lights on to what Christmas foreshadowed, what it means to the heart of humanity...not what it means to the heart of consumerism.

So, I thought about Rudolph and how when he turned on the Lights, he saved Christmas...why can't he do it again?

Dale Harris (one of my Middle School Leaders), myself and a group of teens put together a video, which will foreshadow this whole theme for our BIG Christmas party on December 23, 2009. Below is episode 1...I will leak more as time goes on. This is my take on what God has for teens this year: Turn on the Lights ("Save Christmas, Save the World")

Old Skool Jesus #6

2009-11-24T15:10:00.001-08:00

Last week, we talked about one of my favorite subjects: The Resurrection of Jesus Christ!

I opened the night with a great little video I'm sure most of you have seen called: "Jesus is my Friend" (below) and got them laughing to begin.

Then I went back to a couple of my earlier talks about Jesus being God and a quick recap of the cross. I shared that the people who doubted (i.e. Jesus' family and disciples) that he was in fact God, no longer doubted after the resurrection!

The Main text I went to was 1 Corinthians 15 and delved into the discussion with them about how Jesus showed up to more than 500 people at one time. I asked them if we took the whole room (about 62 of them) put them all in the same "dream center" when they woke if they'd all had the same dream.

They said it would be impossible for all of them to have the same dream. I shared how some people have tried to say that all 500 people that Paul is referring to (some who are still alive at the point of the writing) were high and all tripping at the same time and somehow all had the same hallucination. It just can't happen!

There were tons of other things sprinkled into prove that he really did rise, but I ended with the one that is most convincing to me...that of Paul seeing the resurrected Christ!

Saul before he became Paul, hated Jesus. He despised his followers and felt that it was his mission to watch as many of them die for their stupid belief in Jesus. He would stand by and gladly watch Christian after Christian die, until Jesus came to him.

Jesus stopped him on the road (a route he was taking to slaughter upwards of 150 Christians) in bodily form and declared his deity as well as resurrection to Saul. From that moment on, Saul believed and was renamed Paul.

I told the teens; the only explanation for such a change in Saul is that Jesus really is alive. All of the nay-sayers who have their theories have weak explanations that are ignorant of the facts at best and plain idiocy at worst.

JESUS IS ALIVE! It's the base of our faith, without it the cross, Jesus birth and Christianity would be worthless...but He indeed did rise and our faith is the one true faith because JESUS IS THE Way!

Old Skool Jesus #5

2009-11-12T06:28:00.000-08:00

This week was pretty freakin' sweet! We went to the deep level of walking through the crucifixion, step by gory step.

I started by telling the students that we don't remember or even know the true depth of pain, humiliation and torture that Jesus went through on the cross. In Jesus' day, the word "cross" was equivalent to a swear word, because it was so gory, so nasty that it wasn't even spoken in normal conversation.

We have trivialized the cross to a common saying similar to: "Oh, Jesus died on the cross, yea, cool".

It's not that easy to just flippantly say, because when we go to the cross with Jesus and discover the radical depth of what happened there, we should no longer be able to say "Jesus died on the cross" sans emotion.

I started in the Garden in Matthew 26, talked about Jesus' apparent stress over his impending death. He was so stressed that he sweat blood. Then came the emotional stress of being betrayed by one of his closest friends, Judas.

I next moved to his time with Pilate, then the walk from there to Herod's, then the walk back to Pilate's, all the while mentioning the beatings that he took at each place. Jesus by the second time he was in front of Pilate was a tired, emotionally spent and all together done physically.

That's when the cat of 9-tails came out and the crown of thorns was beat into Jesus head. The whip which Jesus was beat with had 9 long leather straps, each laced with: bones, metal balls, glass shards, metal shards and metal hooks.

He was tried By Pilate and the Sanhedrin, where everyone screamed for his death by crucifixion, except for Pilate who thought beating Jesus to the brink of death would satisfy the Jews. So, Pilate washed his hands of Jesus and allowed Him to be crucified.

Then 9inch Spikes went deep into Jesus wrists and feet wrists, in which they struck 4 gigantic nerves that drove electric shock waves of pain all through the Body of Jesus. They then hung him on the rugged cross, where he eventually died of asphyxiation.

This of course was a synopsis of the talk, but even in that tiny bit of it, we can see the cross was no easy task. In fact 99% of people who were recorded as having been whipped 40 times with the Roman cat of 9tails died. Jesus was whipped 39 times...

I shared my favorite verse (Which is also tattooed to my arm) 1 Peter 2:24: "(A) He himself bore our sins in his body on the tree, that we(B) might die to sin and(C) live to righteousness.(D) By his wounds you have been healed."

I then jumped into the topic of what the cross does for us, in which I defined the Doctrine of Justification. I know you're thinking: You talked about a Doctrine to Middle Schoolers? Yes...I did.

I broke it down in Middle School terms. I said imagine a Jelly Donut. Now, realize that that Jelly Donut is you and due to Romans 3:23, we know we have junk in our lives. So your jelly donut, instead of filled with good jelly (or custard, whichever your preference is) it is filled with a big, fat pile of steaming cat poop, that poop is the sin in your heart and life.

When Jesus died on the cross, he was dying for the sin in that donut of your life. That's why 1 Peter 2:24 says: "He Himself BORE OUR SINS...". Jesus had us in mind when He was on the cross, saying: "I Love you, that is why I am enduring this pain".

When we believe in this truth and accept Jesus as our God and Savior, He wipes all the poop out of our donuts, so we are now made right before God. However, he doesn't leave it an empty shell of a donut, he fills it with the best jelly/custard in the universe...The Righteousness of Jesus!

Not only are you made right before God, but He now sees Jesus in you and He forgets and forgives the sins (cleaning out the donut) and sees only Jesus!!!

After this last part of the talk, I broke them up into small groups to talk about the horrific death of Jesus and made it a bit more comfortable for them if they wanted to make a decision for Jesus. They really got it and understood not only the doctrine of Justification, but the truth and importance of the cross! It was a great night.

The Discussion questions can be downloaded for the entire series here: http://www.archive.org/details/OldSkoolJesus

Also, here is the video I showed this week to "lighten things up":

Old Skool Jesus #4

2009-11-03T10:23:00.000-08:00

This week, we came back to our theme: "Old Skool Jesus" with a talk on "Why Did Jesus Come?"

One of the leaders in the Middle School Ministry (Pete) spoke to the teens on Tuesday night and I spoke to them Wednesday Night.

Pete had a great opening (which I stole) where he placed around the room pictures of people who needed help. Some were hilarious pictures of people getting hurt and others were more serious in nature where people were fleeing from armies for their very lives.

We had a piece of paper next to each picture and we asked the teens to go around the room and write out what they thought these people needed in this moment of crisis.

Some kids of course wrote sill things, others were serious. The overall idea was that some people need help and "earthly" things just won't do.

We asked the Big Question: "Why Did Jesus Come?" (Pete took a different tack than I did, so I will share what I did)

Jesus in John 6:38-40 says this: "For I have come down from heaven, not to do my own will but the will of him who sent me. And this is the will of him who sent me, that I should lose nothing of all that he has given me, but raise it up on the last day. For this is the will of my Father, that everyone who looks on the Son and believes in him should have eternal life, and I will raise him up on the last day."

Jesus came to do the will of His Father and His Father's will is that people would look to Jesus for eternal Salvation.

Jesus also said that he came to seek and save the lost(Luke 19:10: "For the Son of Man came to seek and to save the lost.") and he came to be a doctor to the sick (Luke 5:31-32: "And Jesus answered them, "Those who are well have no need of a physician, but those who are sick. I have not come to call the righteous but sinners to repentance.")

Finally, I shared with the students that Jesus came to fulfill the Law, because He had to, we needed Him to. He fulfilled the roles of: Prophet, Priest and King. I gave some funny stories of Kings, like where David cuts Saul's robes while he's pooping (1 Samuel 24:1-4). I also gave some funny stories of Prophets, like Ezekiel cooking food over poop (Ezekiel 4:12-14), as well as making a "Lego version" of Jerusalem and destroying it (Ezekiel 4:1-3).

Lastly I was very serious about Priests and described that Jesus came not only to offer sacrifice for our sins, but he was THE Sacrifice for our sins! I shared that in Hebrews it says that without the shedding of blood, there can be no forgiveness of sins (Hebrews 9:22), so Jesus had to come and he had to die. Jesus is our Prophet who came and preached the truth of God (just like the prophets of old), he is also our King, for He talked about His Kingdom (John 18:36-37) and claimed to be God (which He is!). He will one day come back with a sword in his hand and a tattoo on His leg and take down those who oppose Him (Revelation 19:11-21). Finally, He is our Priest who offered Himself as our sacrifice!

Here is the video we showed as a "funny intro"

Atomic Blast---Gladiators!

2009-10-28T09:10:00.000-07:00

This w eek, we've taken a break from the "Old Skool Jesus" series and did a Big Event Outreach.

We do these large events every 3 months and the focus is evangelism. Our hope is to see kids come to Christ not by forcing it down their throats, but by engaging in a conversation.

We have HUGE games, great food, excellent music and a good speaker to bring a personal story about Jesus.

I will be giving you all the games we did and descriptions of them below. I've uploaded a diagram of each game into one PDF file, here is the link: http://www.archive.org/details/GladiatorGames
(first page is blank)

My handwriting is horrible, so the text for each game and the description will be below. This game worked well with 65 people and we will do it again tonight with another 115 people (approx.). However, I think you could utilize all of these games with a group of about 10 or more (just make less teams and smaller numbers).

Lastly about the diagrams, we set up the "paint ball obstacles" for the whole night...it added a cool dynamic as well as added to the challenges of the other games.

Game Descriptions:

Game #1 Ball Brawl
- 4 Teams, one at each corner of the gym
- Each team chooses 4 people to stand in front of the stages for their perspective teams.
- For each team of four, 2 will be bound together as will the other 2. So there will be 16 people in the front all together in 8 pairs
- The rest of the team members will stand on their perspective stages
- The students in front of the stages will then (when the whistle blows) go for the balls in the middle of the gym
- They will then toss the balls back to their teammates on the stage so they (the ones on stage) can shoot the ball into the trash can across the gym diagonally
- The team with the most points at the end of the allotted time wins

Game #2 Realays
- Every team and team meber must play
- We will divide each team into sets of pairs
- The pairs will run the relay and when they are done, smack hands to the next pair until the last pair goes.
- The team that has all there team members complete the relay first wins
-One of the pair members will sit on a wooden scooter to begin with, the other will pull them by their foot
- When they get to the big tube, the sitter will crawl through, while the puller waits for them to get out on the other side.
- The sitter will then sit again and be pulled to the baseball bat set in front of the stage diagonally across from theirs.
- The sitter will then spin around the bat 5 times
- The sitter will then be the puller
- The puller will pull the new sitter to the big tube, let the new sitter crawl through while going to the other side waiting for them to come out.
- The sitter will sit back on the scooter and the puller will pull them back to their stage, smack hands with the next pair and this will continue until over.

Game #3 Bedlam Gauntlet
- The leaders will all go to one side of the gym, while the students go to the other
- The students will attempt to go from one side of the gym to the other in 3 minutes time
- The leaders will be equipped with either a dodge ball or a Nerf gun to shoot at and try to hit the teens
- The gym will have obstacles the kids can hide behind, but close objects leaders can sneak behind and fire!
- If there are more than 4 that can make it across in the 3 minute time, we will continue until 4 remain

Game #4 Jousting (the 4 winning people from the Gauntlet get to play)
- Just like at JOLT-- Our District Retreat
- We will have 2 pushers and 2 riders
- the riders will attempt to knock off the tennis ball on top of the other riders head
- They joust until the ball falls off.
- If there is time, we will choose 4 more (leaders??)

"Old Skool Jesus" will continue next week with the lesson "Why Did Jesus Come?"

Old Skool Jesus #3

2009-10-20T10:17:00.001-07:00

As part of our ongoing "Old Skool Jesus" series, I have been uploading information for you all to utilize and work with.

If you haven't downloaded the "Old Skool Jesus" small group questions/teaching guide go here: http://www.archive.org/details/OldSkoolJesus

This is for week 3 on the guide titled: "The REAL Jesus". This week we take a look at the humanity of Christ and answer the question: "Why does Jesus have to be human?" (Hebrews 4:15; Matthew 4:11) Also, the "How Human was Jesus?" question gets answered.

I've uploaded a document called: "Biblical Proof for Christ's Humanity" which you can download here: http://www.archive.org/details/BiblicalProofOfChristsHumanity

As you can probably tell, I'm loving this series! Below is the video I'll be showing this week. It comes from vintage21.com and is just hilarious!

Old Skool Jesus #2

2009-10-13T10:25:00.000-07:00

Old Skool Jesus is now in full swing. We have 1 week down and 11 to go, starting tonight with week 2's talk entitled: "Who Is Jesus?".

I said I would post the tools I used for my lessons and I am no liar :) Below is the intro video I showed to jumpstart the series. I will also post below the video and the handout for tonight. This way you can see where we were last week and see where we are this week. I hope you all can utilize this series, that's why I am putting the efforts into posting it all for you to check out! If you still need the Outline, the url is here: http://www.archive.org/details/OldSkoolJesus

Last Weeks Video:

Along with "Who Is Jesus" is a take home handout which outlines all of the 'I AM' statements thet Jesus made as well as where they are found in the Bible. Here is the url to snag this document: http://www.archive.org/details/JesusIAmSayings

This Weeks Video:

To answer a couple questions:

1. When you teach, is this your whole talk or just and outline you have with you?
Answer: Just an outline. I read the texts, and utilize the questions as items I try to address in the talk.

2. Why are you doing a series on Jesus for 12 whole weeks?
Answer: I think Middle School is where teens can start to "get it". Taking 12 weeks to talk about Jesus is in my mind almost too short of a time. Jesus should be the key/central focal point of minsitry...so we need to preach Him as much as we can.

3. What books did you use to plan/study for this series?
Answer: The main text I used was Vintage Jesus by Mark Driscoll, but I also leaned heavily on: Mere Christianity by C.S. Lewis, Your Jesus is Too Safe by Jared Wilson, Surprised By Hope by N.T. Wright, The Reason For God by Timothy Keller. A took BITS from: Jesus Brand Spirituality by Ken Wilson and Jesus Among Other Gods by Ravi Zaccherius.

Old Skool Jesus

2009-09-30T12:34:00.000-07:00

As I promised, I have put together my 12 week series on "Old Skool Jesus" and I wanted to share the whole thing here!

At the end of this post will be a link for you to download a PDF of all 12 weeks. It is set up in I.D.E.A format (Introduction, Description, Explanation and Application).

I hope you all can use these either in total or as a spinrgboard for your own thoughts.

The book I got most of my in-depth stuff (other than the Bible) was Mark Driscoll's book Vintage Jesus which gives incredible insight into the God-hood, personhood and life of Jesus!

You'll notice that there are pieces of "give-aways" mentioned within the discussion guides. I will post those as I make them. Again, enjoy!!

Here is the link: http://www.archive.org/details/OldSkoolJesus

When you get there, look in the "view the book" box to the left and click "PDF" in order to download the document!

Old Skool Jesus

2009-09-17T18:03:00.000-07:00

I've moved from Nyack, NY back to my hometown in Pittsburgh, PA. I am now one of 5 Youth Pastors on staff at Allegheny Center Alliance Church (http://www.acacstudenministries.net/). My main focus is the Middle School area of Student Ministries. I am loving my new job and have been doing a series called iBelong to kick off the school year. I've done it before, but it is still very good!

As I sat back and prayed as to what God wanted me to teach on next, I couldn't stop thinking about Jesus. So, I'm going to do a risky thing and do a 12 week series on Jesus.

Why is it risky? It's risky because it's a long time to talk about one man. It's risky because it's not a "super hip" series. It's risky because most people just don't do it.

I've been convicted that Jesus is first and foremost. I am pumped about this new series and have been working away at producing some material the leaders can take with them, read ahead of time and come each week fully prepared. My hope is to have the 12 weeks of stuff done by next week. We won't kick off this series until October (either the first or second week).

Old Skool Jesus will take the "New Skool Jesus" and kick his butt. He wasn't just a good man, nice teacher or a homeboy...He is fully God, fully Man and 100% He-Man! I will blog about each week when it kicks off, I will post my media productions, small group productions and talk sheets so anyone who wants to see where I've been going, or wants to do something similar, you have some material to look at!

Oh How I love Poo Stories

2009-07-16T10:47:00.000-07:00

So here's the whole story. I was at a hotel and I wanted a soda...I mean I was feindin' me some Diet Mtn. Dew real bad.

I grabbed a couple 1 dollar bills so I could get one in the hotel vending machine. I get to the machine and the machine takes no dollar bills "at this time" whatever that means.

So, I take my dollar bills and stick them into a snack vending machine and hit the "coin return" button. The machine returns to me 10 dimes.

No problem, I say, so I precede to stick the dimes in the soda vending machine. No dice. This obstinate machine doesn't take dimes...ever. SO, I decide that since I have a pocket full of dimes, I should walk over to the gas station/convenience store across the street from the hotel.

I get to the store and lo and behold "The Sign" (see left for "The Sign").

Naturally I was ticked off...I wanted a flippin' soda! Yet, when I read the sign, I HAD to laugh and then take a photo...

Seriously, who takes a dump for 20 minutes?! Especially when you are on the job and are the only one.

NOT only that...but who expects to have a 20 minute dump and makes a sign beforehand!?! I mean seriously, this person must've written this sign up on their home Dell PC (piece of crap), printed it out and brought it to work with them...

AHHH! That's the story behind "The Sign" Do you have any stories like this?

Non-Religious Disciples

2009-07-01T07:03:00.000-07:00

I have an atheist in my youth group. We talk a lot about God, Jesus, religion and sin. He has provocative questions that spark my own brain, searching through the Word to help him see Jesus more clearly.

His biggest issue is this: "Religion has ruined the world". I would have to agree.

Don't burn me at the stake as a heretic, there is a point here. Just hear me out.

I would say however, it's less "Religion" and more "Religious People" that have harmed the world more so than not. Religious people are the fanatics that "do the right thing". They are the ones who in an effort to become more holy add to the Bible (or Quran, Book of Mormon etc.).

These Religious People are the groups that picket Homosexuals with signs that say: "God hates Fags".

The main issue with this type of fanatic is that they miss they're own junk. They are so busy pointing fingers that they NEVER repent. They don't see what they do to others as hate crimes, but the would say it is: "Bringing the truth in love".

A book which discusses this issue HEAVILY is The Prodigal God by Timothy Keller. He calls this "Religious Person" the Elder Brother.

Keller rightly talks about how the story of the Prodigal Son (Luke 15:11-32) is about BOTH sons, not just the Lost and Returned son. Jesus was giving the story to both the RELIGIOUS (Pharisees) as well as the NON-RELIGIOUS. Both sons were sinners. Both sons needed the love of the Father to wash over them...only one son allowed that love to wash over him. It was the younger son or the "Prodigal". The elder son, self-righteously declined the Father's love because he "worked all his life" for the father.

Yet, Keller points out: the elder son worked not because he loved the father, but because he loved himself. He was working for "His Reward" rather than for His Father. The younger son did the same thing with his leaving. It was for himself. Yet...the younger realized his sin or "came to his senses" and returned to the father and repented.

The Elder son didn't even realize his folly! Jesus was in effect pleading with the Pharisees to see their sins and repent.

Because it's not how good "you follow the rules" it's how well you know Him!

This is why I say Religious People have caused more harm than good. Most lack the true intimate relationship with Jesus, all the while following the rules. This brings a Spiritual arrogance that most people (inside or outside of the church) find insufferable. It is also the main reason most teens hate church or are even afraid to go to church.

Gandhi said it well, when he said: "...I do not like your Christians..they are so unlike your Christ."

In essence, I believe he ran into way too many Religious People...who were NOT true Christ Followers.

This whole blog came about as I was thinking how I disciple the Youth that God has entrusted to me. I feel we should beat the Elder brother out of them (with Jesus and not fists of course). Generating Religious rather than Jesus Disciples is in effect worse than not doing anything. This is so, because teens are turned off to Jesus because of the way the Religious People have portrayed Christianity.

I was reading a book titled: The Big Idea in which the first chapter says: NO MORE CHRISTIANS. In which the author (Dave Ferguson) says how he is called to disciple Christ Followers, not Christians. This is because the title "Christian" has become derogatory and in effect not effective in bringing people to Jesus.

In Youth Ministry (or any ministry) Christ asks his people to make disciples...not converts...not Pharisees (or Elder Brothers or Religious People) but DISCIPLES. People who seek what Christ seeks. People who desire what Christ desires...not people who try to "do the right thing all the time".

Training people to hang with the people Christ hung with is hard within the Religious paradigm. This is because we're taught "Bad company corrupts good character". Many a religious person has said that this was God's Word telling us to stop hanging out with bad people, or sinners. YET, if we are to follow Jesus' example...we are to minister to the SICK (i.e. sinners).

I could go on and on about issues that are pervasive within the religious paradigm. However, in today's culture as Pastors, we need to get back to the Bible and reach out to the World, making disciples... not religious ones, but Jesus one's.

iBelong

2009-06-18T11:57:00.001-07:00

When I was in college, studying Youth Ministry, one of the lines our Prof. Len Kageler would say is: "In Youth Ministry, we need to steal ideas from one another, for the Glory of God". I fully agree! Some great ideas are produced by Youth Pastors all over the place, so why not "borrow" some of them! I post all my stuff in the hopes that any Youth Pastor reading it can indeed steal my ideas and mold them for his/her own group.

Anyways, this idea of iBelong is kind of a hodge-podge thievery.

First, the idea of belonging and the deep seated need for it has been a topic discussed (especially recently) by a ton of top notch Youth Guys (i.e. Marko from YS, Andrew Root and many others).

Second, a Youth Pastor friend of mine (named Jimmy D) had all these great themes all tricked out with the letter "i" in front of it to make it kinda feel like iPod (further connecting to youth culture).

As I prayed about what the Jr. Highers in Nyack needed to be hearing about, this theme of belonging screamed out at me. Jr. High was a rough three year spell in my life. I didn't feel like a belonged anywhere, really. I was picked on at school for being the "Bible Boy" or even once, I was called "Blow Fish" by a girl named Ashley (who then proceeded to make a blow fish face). Even at youth group I was picked on. In a LEADERSHIP TEAM meeting, someone put a huge tack on my chair which I sat on...of course. So, I too can relate to this innate need to belong to something bigger than myself.

I asked God to lead me to Bible Characters whom have all dealt with this issue of Belonging, seeking God's answers for people, but teen especially about the need and desire for belonging.

Week 1 was the Prodigal Son. He thought he belonged with all the "rich kids" and drunks he hung out with. He blew his inheritance trying to gain their acceptance and love. He spent "mad amounts of money" (teen lingo for a ton of money) on clothes, food and wine. Eventually he ran out of money...and was abandoned by his "friends". He sat there wondering where he belonged...knew that the place where he was, was NOT it and decided to go work for Pops.

What the son didn't realize is that His father was waiting for him. He didn't understand until his Daddy was kissing and hugging him that he belonged with his Daddy. He belonged in the love and care of his Father's arms!

Week 2 was the Woman caught in Adultery. This woman was hated by her people. She was looked down upon, ridiculed and dragged into the middle of the street so the people could expose her and her sin to Jesus. What would he do? They wondered. In short, this woman belonged nowhere and to no one. She was the woman with the "Scarlet Letter" (most 8th graders have this in their curriculum, so you can use it as a illustration and they'd get it). She was scorned. Jesus however, gives her belonging...with Himself. He saves her from death by stoning and calls out the stone throwers. He then says: "Go and sin no more". He gives her safety and salvation first, then asks her to change her life!

Many scholars would say that this very woman was Mary Magdalene. If that is so, we see her life radically different from that day forth. She is a devout follower of Christ and is even among the first to see his resurrected body! Talk about belonging!

Week 3 was the Ethiopian Eunuch. This guy was a bag of not belonging. He had no balls, he was African and he wanted to meet God. I'm still not sure how, but people knew he was a Eunuch. Thus, being so he would not be allowed to enter certain places within the temple in Jerusalem. The text infers that he was there seeking God...and was on his way back to his own country, still trying to figure it out. He is in the midst of reading Isaiah and is supremely confused by the text. (He obviously wasn't helped much at all by the people in Jerusalem). In walks Philip and explains the text. The text is talking about Jesus! Philip explains from that text on through the life, death and resurrection of Christ what Isaiah was talking about.

The Eunuch catches the idea that he too can belong to Christ, accepts the truth about Jesus and then gets baptized!

*If you're not catching it, all these stories tie into Belonging to Christ, Belonging with Christ...explaining that the meta-narrative of the Bible is that we Belong in the family of Christ! Not all will accept, or believe this, but God desires all to know Him*

Week 4 was the Samaritan Woman. Samaritans in general were despised by the world. The Jews called them "abominations" and people outside of Jewish or Samaritan decent just thought they were the scum of the earth. This woman would've been the scum of the scum. She had 5 husbands and was living with a man who was not her husband! Even in Samaria, this was looked down upon. She didn't belong, even with the scum of the earth!

She was so despised by the world and her own people, that she went to draw water at a time she knew no one else would be there...too bad for her (or so good?) Jesus was there. A Jewish Rabbi. Jesus shocks her. He begins a conversation (something totally taboo...especially for a Rabbi). He shares with her about himself, about herself and gives her belonging. It's a beautiful story, one that is finished by Samaritans coming to Jesus through one, despised woman who received the Gift from God!

Next week, we are finishing off the series with: "The Reason We Can Belong" which will entail the message of the Gospel and will show the Cross to the Jr. Highers in detail.

In Christ, because of His death, we too can Belong to His family! Hallelujah!

Q #3: 3 Practical Questions

2009-06-02T07:04:00.000-07:00

*This is Part 3 of a 3 part series. Part 1&2 are here: Q #1: 3 Practical Questions; Q #2: 3 Practical Questions*

Q #3: What's In My Hand?

Dave Gibbons in his book: The Monkey and the Fish asks this question of himself, his church leadership and his ministry third. He illustrates this idea of "what's in my hand?" with the story of Moses in Exodus 4:1-5. This is where Moses shares with God that he is not good enough to lead God's people to freedom, nor does he think they will believe Him. He states: “But behold, they will not believe me or listen to my voice, for they will say, ‘The Lord did not appear to you.’”

The Lord said to him, “What is that in your hand?”

He [Moses] said,“A staff.” And he [God] said, “Throw it on the ground.” So he threw it on the ground, and it became a serpent...

Moses was making excuses, God gave answers. Moses didn't think he had anything of value to offer. God showed him that he did.

Dave goes on to discuss how we get hung up within ministry on the things WE DON'T have, rather than the things we DO have.

If I'm honest, I do this and I use the things I don't have as excuses for my ministry. Here are a few I've said in Youth Ministry:

"My budget is way to small to do much of anything"

"My leader core is too small for us to grow"

"I'm over-worked, I can't do ANYTHING else"

"My church is too small to do real deal BIG time ministry, so why try"

"The teens I work with would never like it"

"I'm not a worship leader, so I just won't have worship"

Wow...do those sound familiar? I bet they do. We as Youth Pastors forget what's in our hands. We forget that God has gifted us with great leaders who are willing to do what it takes. We forget that God has gifted us with the ability to teach/preach or innovate.

We forget the time we played Super-hero on a low budget when we were kids...the time when we allowed our imagination...not the COST lead and direct what we did.

Ministry is tough. However, we need to focus on what we already have in our hands...not what we're lacking. God has placed us where we are for a reason...maybe that imagination will come in handy (even if you do eventually have a HUGE Youth budget).

Here's a HUGE thing we have in our hands...something Moses forgot and something we forget too:

We Have GOD!

In ministry, sadly I have forgotten this. I'm complaining, whining or just not paying attention, so I miss the fact that God is with me. I have HIS Holy Spirit within me. I have His Word in Front of me...yet I neglect to seek His counsel. I say, as Moses did: “Who am I that I should go to Pharaoh and bring the children of Israel out of Egypt?” (Exodus 3:11). I question what he has called me to, I question my ability, I complain about my circumstances and God says to me (as he did Moses: “But I will be with you..." (Exodus 3:12)

God is with us. He is the gift giver who has given us what is already in our hands. Sometimes we need to sit, rest in the Lord and open our eyes yet again to what he has already given to us. This is the reality of ministry: we will forget. However, when we read His Word and feel, hear and experience His Spirit, may we continue to see His great gifts...and USE them!

Q #2: 3 Practical Questions

2009-05-27T08:11:00.000-07:00

*This is Part 2 of a 3 part series. Part 1 is here: Q #1: 3 Practical Questions*

Q #2: What Is My Pain?

Dave Gibbons in his book: The Monkey and the Fish asks this question of himself, his church leadership and his ministry second. He illustrates that the world has turmoil, hard times and the "prosperity gospel" isn't where it's at. He asks himself the question "what is my pain" so he can use the pain from within his own life as a tool to connecting across cultural, racial and gender lines.

It is no secret that teens today have pain. The world we live in is fallen and depraved. Teens question (especially in their upper grade level years) how there can be so much pain and a Good God all at the same time. On more than one occasion I have been stopped with this very question as well as others similar to it all pointing to the same idea: "why is there pain?"

Divorce.

Murder.

Theft.

Rape.

Suicide.

Injustice.

Racism.

All pieces to a painful puzzle that teenagers deal with on a daily basis.

How do we as Youth Pastors respond? Do we give pat answers to real struggles? Sadly, I know I have. Do we brush off pain as something that happens "in a fallen world" and leave a teenager who doesn't even understand theologically what that means with just that to bank on? Again, I know I have.

This idea of where is my pain is a GREAT one for Youth Pastors to grab onto. It opens the doors of authentic ministry. It shows the teens that we too struggle with pain, have struggled with pain and will continue to do so. It shows a life that has been transformed through pain rather than simple words that explain away pain. It is living, incarnate ministry rather than "preachy, teachy" ministry.

It causes us to preach our failures, our hurts and our struggles rather than our successes, feel good moments and triumphs. Teenagers today don't want to hear all about how good we are. They want to hear how we failed and if there is hope for them when they fail. They want to see and hear what our struggles are, where we fall short so they can know they are not alone.

Looking at myself for a second, I realize I have a lot of pain I've had to deal with. My life has not been a "walk in the park" as they say.

My parents were divorced. My dad tried to commit suicide right in front of me and my family. My sister walked away from God. My mom married a drunk who wet himself on our couch each night. My mom chose another drunk, this time a Jehovah's Witness over her own son. I was a loser in Jr. High and the list goes on. This is MY pain and it is universal. There are people of all sorts of backgrounds that have similar pain. It is cross-cultural when we connect to our pain and teach from it. We have a connection through our pain with people we'd otherwise be tempted to write off. We have a connection to teenagers whom otherwise wouldn't listen t a thing we said through our pain.

God can use our pain to TEACH His Truth.

Let me state something here, now that we are on the same page with our pain. Dave in his book, missed this point, but I think it is vital.

In order to teach from our pain, we have to be healed of it's sting.

What I mean by this is, the pain we teach from MUST have already been healed in our lives. If we teach about pain that is still residing within us AS PAIN which God has not yet touched, we will teach the pain through bitterness, rather than salvation. Pain taught and preached through bitterness will not produce salvation in our teens...it will reap a harvest of bitterness.

This doesn't mean the pain is no longer felt, but it does mean that the sting is gone. One can still mourn their parents divorce and be healed from the sting of the divorce.

In order to teach authentically, we must not be numb to the pain, but we must be inoculated with Christs' healing so it can no longer produce the evil Satan meant it to.

In this way, we connect out pain to the teens we teach, but we can also bring them through healing from that pain. If we haven't been healed yet, how can we help those who are also not yet healed?

We must connect with our pain in order to teach authentically to today's teen.

Q #1: 3 Practical Questions

2009-05-26T10:38:00.000-07:00

Over the past couple of years, I've really transitioned into being an avid reader. I love learning new things, and learning new ways to think about the way I do ministry. I try not to read simply for "expounding my head knowledge" but I try to read for transformation, asking: "What can I take away from this for where I am".

While reading The Monkey and the Fish I put on these lenses and came out with some really amazing stuff that I can add to my ministry...and I hope you can benefit as well.

The author Dave Gibbons has a ton to say on why we should live differently as Christians in this world. He also gives the how. He is very insightful on how it is necessary for Christians (especially us Westerners) to be globally focused on the mission of Christ, thinking how we can stop being homogeneous and start being what he calls "Third culture". He calls for a radical racial reconciliation that looks at each people group (as well as the individual person) as an integral piece of the Body of Christ, rather than simply "flowing with the comfortable" he admonishes us to "get messy" and reach out.

All of these ideas have incredible implications to Emerging Youth Ministry. Doing ministry within a homogeneous context is (and will continue to be) impossible with this generation. It goes along with an idea Dan, a friend of mine has been talking about when he says we NEED to be inclusive as opposed to exclusive (to read his amazing thoughts, go here: EMERGING YOUTH). However, I want to focus in on 3 questions Dave Gibbons asks himself (as well as the leadership of his church).

The Three questions are:

1. Where Is Nazareth? (Page 114) 2. What Is My Pain? (Page 116) 3. What Is In My Hand? (Page 119)

Dave unpacks these in light of the Church's mission as well as his place within the calling of said church. I am going to internalize them and unpack them in light of today's Youth Ministry.

Q #1: Where Is Nazareth?

Dave shares how Jesus grew up as a carpenter's son in Nazareth. It's the place people considered the slums, the dump or the ghetto. It's no place for a respected Rabbi to grow up...much less God! "Can anything good come from Nazareth?" someone questioned of Jesus and of His legitimacy.

Now picture the Nazareth of your town, or city. Picture the place where adults say things like: "no teen who lives there could ever succeed". Picture your ghetto...where is it? Who lives there? What type of teenager comes out of there? What's the rate of single moms there? What's the crime rate from your Nazareth? What's the average household income there? Lastly...are there any teens within your Youth Ministry from that Nazareth?

We all have a Nazareth. We all can label it. We all can name it. However, do we claim it as a place where God can move? Are we too timid to reach out and reach in to the hurting and the broken there?

Christ not only lived in Nazareth, but he transformed people's perception of it. He even visited an even worse neighborhood and talked with a woman who could've made him look bad. She was a Samaritan Woman who had several adulterous affairs. She had too many husbands and was currently sleeping and living with a man who was not her husband! Yet, he reached out to her and reached into her life! (John 4:1-26). It is a beautiful picture of Christ asking "Where is Nazareth", going there and then bringing the Truth to that place.

As Youth Ministers are we actively seeking the Nazareth's in our midst? Or, are we simply staying comfortable hanging with the church kids while creating a homogeneous churchy country club?

I am deeply challenged with this and many more questions. Q #2 coming soon...

Teens and Sex

2009-05-06T11:20:00.000-07:00

I am currently reading a book called: Hero: Becoming the Man She Desires by Fred and Jasen Stoeker. It is about men (geared toward teens and college age men) being pure until marriage.

Of course, I agree with the basic premise and a ton of what the author's say is true about sexuality and purity...

However, it is a book that will ultimately FAIL at reaching teenage/college age boys with the message of purity. It is a legalistic, almost Amish view of life, that will NOT resonate with today's teen, nor college age person.

The authors are constantly saying: you need to be a man and choose purity. Stop being a sex pervert and choose to be pure...so you can be a Hero for God.

The author Fred hails his son Jasen as the example for all men to be pure. He lifts him up to demi-god status describing how his son is a victor over sex and it's strongholds.

The main problem with this book (so far at least) is that it is all "works based" as well as "shame based". Saying you need to work on it, or else you won't be a Hero. All in an effort to get young men to choose purity. So far (50 pages in) the book has not ONCE said that you need God in order to do this. In fact it has said that a real man of God can do it just by dedicating oneself to being pure. The authors have said that it's all you, being a hero for God. YOU choose, YOU walk away from and YOU are a Hero...

I don't know about you, but I can't live the Christian life without the Spirit of God living inside me, making me Holy. If it were left to my own choosing, I would not choose God...yet His Spirit residing inside me has changed me and it is His power that I choose what's right...not my own.

Teens need a different message about sex. Purity, YES, but not shame based, nor works based teaching! That will drive them further into sex...not closer to purity.

Imagine a book written to smokers. Imagine the author says this: "Don't you oh smoker know that smoking can harm you, even kill you? It's bad for you! You can choose NOT to smoke. Just stop already! Oh and if your looking for an example, my son has never smoked. He always walked away from smoking and cigarettes. He's a Hero for God because he's chosen not to smoke. You should choose not to smoke, or stop smoking now so you too (like my son) can become a hero for God."

I know this is NOT the author's intent. However, if they were students of the culture they were writing to...they'd know that this book would sound like this to a typical teenage guy (Christian or not).

I'm not saying I know the right way to teach purity...because I don't. I simply know that this is not the way. Teen sexuality is a HUGE issue for us as Youth Pastors today, I agree. We need to collaborate together on how to teach this message with the power of the Gospel...not the power of self-reliance.

What do you think Pastors? How can we teach purity in today's Youth Culture?

Sticky Youth Group

2009-04-23T16:00:00.001-07:00

I just got done reading Larry Osborne's Sticky Church and I was truly impressed. The main premise of the book is that Sermon-based small groups are an amazing way to make people stay at your church. It allows for authentic relationships to be formed, made and then maintained. All groups are on the very same page (even if they don't do the exact same thing). They all heard the sermon and are all dedicated to going deeper.

What does this have to do with Emerging Youth Ministry? I think it has a lot to do with it!

I hate to say this, but most of us Youth Pastors don't read outside of our own paradigm of Youth Ministry. We count (alot of times) the "Church" books as irrelevant to our situation and unusable because the concepts therein are set up for "older people" and not teens. This may or may not be the case...BUT there is always some great stuff to be learned within books that are zeroed in on the church, rather than simply youth ministry (eww, stepping on Doug Field's toes there...). To many times, we disregard GREAT ideas because they are for the older peeps in the pews.

This book is NOT like that. In fact Larry Osborne was a Youth Pastor...at one time, so he knows a bit about how we function as well. The practicality of this book will indeed assist with the paradigm shift that many Youth Ministry authors/speakers are calling for, namely Mark Oestreicher.

When I was reading this book, I was thinking to myself: "We could do that with Youth Group to produce a deeper sense of belonging".

Larry also answers some questions that were brought up in Youth Ministry 3.0, such as "how do we get a "think small" attitude for Youth Ministry?" The formatting of the sermon based small group does that and works from large to small group sizes.

Don't get me wrong, it's not a canned small group idea that will "explode your youth ministry"...because it definitely NEEDS to be adapted to your particular group. However, the ideas, strategies and QUESTIONS Larry asks will perk up your mind and make you think about how small groups can be a vital part of your Ministry.

Teens need belonging. Teens need a place where they can be authentic, real and open. A smaller setting does this for teens. This book has some great wisdom and I believe we as youth pastors can harness these great ideas and implement them into our paradigm.

Reading Youth Ministry books is GREAT...but we need to read outside of that as well. We can't be blind to the church movement. In fact, we are called to lead the next church movement, then the next one because we are continually raising up the next church generation...may we never lose sight of that. God is using us to not only bring new people into His flock, but to guide them on how to do church.

I am a huge advocate for small groups and doing "Lesson based" small groups. In fact it's how I've done it for a long time...this book helped me to question why I do it. It also gave me tools to make my small groups better and more efficient.

It gave me a fresh perspective on "Who am I trying to reach?" and "How am I going to do this".

I Small Groups in Youth Ministry and Church Ministry will get larger, hopefully better too. The reason is because small groups create an environment where authentic faith can happen.

I know some of you are thinking: "This is old hat...small groups? C'mon" I would agree...small groups is an old concept. Sometimes it bombs and sometimes it succeeds, this book gives answers as to why.

To conclude: Emerging Youth Ministry will continue to utilize small groups. With that said, we have to learn to do them right, have the right mindset, have the right leaders and have the right mode for our specific place of ministry. This book gives some great insight into all those things.

Not that Type of Christian

2009-04-15T07:28:00.001-07:00

I work part-time at Chili's. Everyone there knows I am a pastor. I've prayed with people, I've given hard truth to some of my Christian co-workers and I've had great chances to share my faith.

The other day, I received one of the BEST comments from a non-Christian I've ever received. He said: "You're not the normal type of Christian, that's why I like you and listen to you". Those words came from my General Manager (GM).

We were talking about faith, swearing, sex and the like. He asked my opinions on all of it. He openly refuted what I was saying and I simply said: "This is what's true. I know it to be true because I've experienced it, lived it and learned it. I'm not going to make you believe what I believe by cramming it down your throat. I'm not out to win an argument, but I want to win your heart". This is what caused him to say: "You're not the normal type of Christian, that's why I like you and listen to you"

Normally I don't put a post that seemingly pats myself on the back and I don't mean to do that with this post. I simply want to make a point.

He then described to me all the Nyack College and ATS (Alliance Theological Seminarians) whom he had discussed theology with in the past. He said they all wanted to argue until they won. He said he would refute them until he was blue in the face and eventually, they all walked away angry and upset that he wasn't listening to them or being won over by there amazing apologetic.

I told my GM that God convicted me of such Faith proclamations and asked me to seek out the persons heart rather than seeking a notch on my belt for winning yet another argument. I told him I desire to live my faith, not just argue for it. God has asked me to be a person who openly lives his faith and loves those around him (even if they refute what I say).

My GM then said: "You do that. That's why I like talking with you. I know I can't get a rise out of you. I hope we can continue to talk about this stuff."

Earlier, I said I want to make a point. Here it is: this is the type of evangelism/apologetic that must be adopted to meet the hunger for God that is there within this generation. Not being "that type of Christian" but being different. A group of people that seek to live their faith, not just argue for it.

Again, I am not saying I am the "poster boy" for this. In fact, this was ONE good story among plenty of HORRIBLE ones where I totally killed the gospel for people because I argued and bickered with them about how I was right and they were wrong. In those moments I didn't care to even HEAR them.

How can we teach our teens about the importance of living our their faith? How can we share with them that it is only through the Holy Spirit that this type of living is possible? How can we disciple our teens into surrendering their lives to Christ? These are all tough questions that we as Youth Pastors wrestle with EVERY day! I hope we can all encourage one-another to seek out these answers so we can see God use this generation to ignite a passion for His name!

Powerful Experience

2009-04-09T08:43:00.000-07:00

When I was a teenager, I participated in a Youth Experience a bit ahead of it's time.

I am sad to say that I have never done this event since I've been a Youth Pastor, but will plan on doing so next year. I wanted to, this year, but with the economic downturn and my going part-time, it was not feasible.

Anyways...this experience I speak of was called: "A Walk With Christ to the Cross". We started this experience by going to our churches Good Friday service, but stayed the entire evening to literally walk with Christ to the Cross.

We followed the week of Christ's passion through video, stations and story. We read and watched the events of The Passion week unfold in sequential order. I was 11 years old when I went through this experience and now as a 24 year old still remember the power it held for my walk with Jesus.

To experience the Passion Week in such detail, with such care taken to catch every aspect of Christ's death was incredible for me.

This is the type of "Emerging" event that gets people connected to the narrative of Christ, and allows them to be placed within the story...for we all are.

The Passion was for all of us. He bled and died so that we may live.

I hope to Walk With Christ to the Cross this Passion/Easter season.

The Apologetics Code...

2009-04-03T08:30:00.000-07:00

I recently blogged on this topic of "Apologetics belonging in Emerging Youth Ministry" and I said I would continue the discussion.

This is that continuation.

Since my last blog, I actually heard a sermon on the verses used last time which was pretty enlightening upon this subject. The sermon was titled: "Suffering to Bless" by Mark Driscoll. He took 1 Peter 3:8-17 and unpacked it for about an hour. I won't give you the whole sermon laid out, but I will give you the last point.

Mark throughout the sermon was discussing how we will suffer for the Gospel, or in general. Suffering is a part of life. He stated that this Scripture gives us 4 counter-weights in which to outweigh our suffering so that we may bless in the midst of it.

Weight #4 was Evangelism. (1 Peter 3:15-16). Below are his notes on this point:

Weight #4: Suffering Makes Evangelism Possible (1 Pet. 3:15–16)

Suffer in such a way that you learn about Jesus and that other people may learn about Jesus too.
Many Christians are good at winning arguments but could care less about winning people. Build respect and trust with people, and answer their questions with humility and honesty.
People want to see if Christianity works, as demonstrated in relationships and community.
Suffering allows us to be a humble, loving, considerate, respectful, gentle people that embody the gospel.

Community Group Question #5: Who can you evangelize? How?

I have to be honest...I love listening to Mark Driscoll preach and when he got to the bolded sub-points, I was shouting: "YES! Preach!"

Our teens need to hear this message. They need to know that evangelizing was never meant to be like a Jehovah's Witness, or a Mormon who goes door to door. Those types bug people in today's society. The reason? The people they are trying to talk to don't know them!

Say for example you go up to someone on the street and say: "I have something amazing to tell you about your life..." What would that persons response be? Probably something like this: "How can you tell me about my life, when I don't know you?"

Then how can we tell them about their future life?

This 1 Peter passage is clear-cut on how and when we should have an answer ready, when people know us. When people see us suffering, yet for some reason able to take the blows. Always be ready to give a answer.

I know I've hit this piece pretty well. I am going to continue to unpack this, because it is vital that we GET THIS RIGHT. We can't shove Jesus down peoples throats, we have to live Jesus, show Jesus and then be questioned about Jesus!

*If you want to read the notes on the whole sermon as well as listen to the sermon, go here: "Suffering to Bless"*

Authentic Youth Ministry

2009-03-31T05:29:00.000-07:00

I was perusing some blogs today on Authenticity. I said in an earlier post that I would continue to discuss this important issue as it pertains to Youth Ministry and a blog caught my eye.

The little portion I will share with you comes from Tim Schraeder who is the communications director at Park Community Church. Here is the beginning of his blog:

"I just read a great article in Fast Company about the appeal and risks of authenticity and it really got me thinking.

Authenticity is derived from the Greek word authentikos, which literally means “real.”

Check this out: “Consumers are gravitating toward brands that they sense are true and genuine. Hunger for the authentic is all around us. You can see it in the way that millions are drawn to mission-driven products…”

Ok, note some keywords here: True. Genuine. Authentic. Mission-driven"

Reading Tim's blog confirmed in my mind that I am not the only one thinking about the importance of authenticity. I know I shared plenty of others who are thinking about it in my last post as well, however this need, desire and awareness seems to be growing.

In the book UnChristian,the authors share that a big turn off to people who don't know Jesus was the in-authenticity of Christians and the Church as a whole.

This study was made up mostly of younger people. It is extremely important that we take notice of this trend and try to bring back the authenticity that so defined the early church. They were real with each other. The had true fellowship. They confessed sins together. They received healing together. They prayed with one another. They opened their homes to each other.

Teens desire this type of community. A place of belonging. A place of intimacy. A place of honesty in a dishonest world. A place where they can be real, warts and all. A place where they can truly "work out their faith with fear and trembling".

Honestly, I feel it starts with us, the Youth Pastor and out team of leaders. We need to set the stage for this type of authenticity. We need to make it a vision for our Youth Group.

What are your thoughts?

I am going to give some ways in which God used my team and I [to begin] to create this type of group. We are by no means "there" but we've been implementing this type of community into our Sr. High ministry and have seen a TON of fruit. I desire to share my journey, so that we can learn together. Please come alongside me on this journey. Tell me what's right, what's wrong or what could work.

It's time for [Youth] Pastors to collaborate together!

A Place for Apologetics in Emerging Culture?

2009-03-26T10:14:00.000-07:00

I've been thinking a ton about the place of apologetics within the context of the Emerging Youth Culture. There is much debate about this topic in certain circles. Many who argue against apologetics say that the Emerging culture wants to hear about and encounter experiences, not scientific reasons for faith. This camp would also argue that the Emerging Culture doesn't hold to science as factual, so giving "scientific evidence" or even "factual arguments" won't help.

On the other hand, the crew for apologetics states that people are still asking questions. People still want to have "answers" to questions that aren't necessarily always experiential. Although there is less bank on the "factual" there is still hope and desire for the "actual".

When it comes to my personal Emerging-ness, I fall in the category of socially liberal, theologically conservative. This category for me, then would mean I fall into the "This culture needs apologetics" faction. However, I think it is more than a "black and white" issue.

We can most definitely should NOT frame apologetics today as we did 30, 20, 10 or even 5 years ago. It must be changed, re-thought, re-taught and all together RENEWED, if today's Emerging Gen. is going to embrace, understand or even use it.

What really sparked my thoughts/interest on this idea is a new book titled: Apologetics for a New Generation. If you are an Emerging [Youth] Pastor, this book is highly recommended.

Most of us, when we hear "apologetics" think of the crazy guy we met at summer camp, or a missions trip who had a WWJD bracelet, Christian T-shirt and a HUGE Bible in his hands who told us to "go out on the streets and convert people for Jeeeesus using this here Bible".

That is NOT what I'm talking about. This is the apologetic I'm talking about:

1 Peter 3:15-16 (New International Version)

But in your hearts set apart Christ as Lord. Always be prepared to give an answer to everyone who asks you to give the reason for the hope that you have. But do this with gentleness and respect, keeping a clear conscience, so that those who speak maliciously against your good behavior in Christ may be ashamed of their slander.

Dan Kimball a GREAT Emerging thinker contributed to the book I mentioned: Apologetics For A New Generation. His chapter, which is chapter 1 frames the point and premise of the whole book. First off is within this passage (which is the apologists main text), Dan asks a good question right off the bat. It is basically this: "Who would ask you to give a reason for the hope you have?". Would people randomly off the street? NOPE. Would close friends, who've noticed your life is different and want to know why? YEP. He unpacks it from the get-go as a relational normalcy. If we are in close relationships with (dare I say it?) non-Christians...this questioning will be NATURAL.

How often did you learn that one? People asking about God, natural? Here, Dan I think hits a soft-spot of apologetic teaching...you should be living a life that gets people to ask you questions...not forcing random people to dialogue about faith who have no relationship with you.

He's saying that the Bible says that these people will know you enough, see your life enough that they have to ask you questions.

Then, it admonishes us to have an answer.

I will continue with this train of thought. Please chew on it, mull it over and write a comment or two wrestling with these implications. Does apologetics have a place in Emerging Culture? If so, where, how, why?

Conquer the Devil...Like I Did!

2009-03-24T11:36:00.000-07:00

Something I've read a lot about, but more importantly have experienced is the need for Authenticity.

If you read my past post on Authenticity (HERE) you'll see how important this issue is to me as a person and as a Youth Pastor.

The old way of doing "preaching" ministry was to not be open, not be real and not be transparent because (it was believed) your people wouldn't listen to you anymore because you were also a sinner... like them.

Most [Youth] Pastors were (and are) trained to look perfect, act perfect and to share stories of TRIUMPH when sharing anything personal (which was in and of itself not encouraged). This way, the people listening to your sermons could have hope that they too can "Conquer The Devil like YOU did".

This train of thought leads people to see a perfect man in you their preacher. It also leads us [the preachers] to think we've got it all together. It takes us down a road of spiritual superiority, spiritual arrogance and in the end spiritual death.

Teens today DON'T WANT TO HEAR how you conquered your sins. They want to hear how you failed, like they do and how GOD helped you out. Teens today are sick of the Spiritual Snobbery that comes with Christianity. Teens today need to learn from hearing about experience...NOT book learned ideals. They want the real, raw, authentic YOU!

A friend of mine, Dan Haugh gets it. He recently wrote a blog post entitled: The Real You? Battling Phone Booth Identities where he deals with this in a deep, thought provoking way.

I've been talking about this for about 2 years as well, right along side of Dan. Other people like Dan Kimball, Mark Driscoll, Mark Oestreicher and David Kinnaman have gone to great lengths to discuss the importance of AUTHENTICITY within this new generations context.

In fact, it was David Kinnaman's extensive research within his book UnChristian that opened my mind to the absolute necessity of authenticity for Youth Ministry today. That book challenged every thing I ever did with a lens of authenticity and caused me to re-arrange how I did Ministry altogether.

This is a key piece to connecting to the coming generations. No longer can we hope they will listen to what we have to say because of our "title". That right needs to be earned and can only be earned through being transparent.

I'm not talking here about "full disclosure". No one would do that, even for the sake of authenticity. I am however admonishing all of us as Youth Pastors to live authentically, minister authentically and share failures of self.

Anyone who works with Youth knows that a teen can smell a fake person from miles away. It smells to them an aromatic STENCH, that they desire to steer clear from.

And, as my friend Dan has accurately stated, it's not just about how you preach, but how you live your life as well. If we are calling our teens to live a resurrected life, being one with Jesus in his resurrection, should we not be leading by example? Albeit a stumbling, bumbling example, for we are all stumbling, bumbling fools when it comes to this life. Should we not be seeking to live the deeper life?

Dan definitely asks some good questions whilst referring to how we then live. He gets introspective and very open about who he is, what he struggles with and how he believes God is leading him.

This is HEALTHY and definitely needed.

A similar type of idea surfaced to me, while thinking and writing this blog post. It comes from uber-blogger Carlos Whittaker. HERE he asks about relevance. Wandering if what we should be seeking after as ministers is relevance. He answers back:

"Do you’re community a favor and don’t ask how you can make your next series or concept relevant. Instead ask how you can make your members and staff relational and real."

Authenticity is relational. It is being real. It is making a conversation rather than teaching a lesson. It is creating a "second space", a place of belonging that teens so desperately need now-a-days! Teens don't want to be taught another lesson on what they shouldn't do, or should do they are tired of being "shoulded" on (thanks Brennan Manning). They are deeply desiring conversation. They want to work out their faith in authentic community.

This will be an ongoing post. Look out for more...

Why a new Blog?

2009-03-24T10:50:00.000-07:00

This new and 2nd blog of mine will deal specifically with Youth Ministry as I see, wrestle and deal with it within my Theology as an Emerging Youth Pastor.

Many things need to change within Youth Ministry and I for one hope to be a voice to help the change, rather than a voice of stagnant complacency.

We are few, but strong as Emerging Youth Pastors. We are also a growing breed as new manifestos are written. New conferences spoken about and new classes taught at Universities and Colleges alike. People are realizing that the way Youth Ministry has "always been done" is no longer a working model.

We must adapt, shift and move with this change and here (Emerging Youth Pastor) is where I desire to display how I am shifting and moving within it.

I will hit many bumps, receive many bruises, but I hope to authentically display how I am dealing with this new dichotomy of movement. I have another blog, which is my personal blog. Some ideas and post will definitely overlap, but this blog is only about Youth Ministry from here on out. I have imported my other blog posts, because some are very relevant to this blog, others not so much...However, I didn't want to start out with another "blank" slated blog.

Please stay tuned with me as I transparently share my journey as an Emerging Youth Pastor!

Heart Novacaine

2009-03-23T17:34:00.001-07:00

I'm thinking a lot about Novocaine today because I just recently got a root canal. This was my fourth root canal...I know stupid for a 24 year old. "It is what it is" a friend of mine is now known as quoting and that's what I have to say about my 4 root canals.

I know most of us know what Novocaine is and does, but just to refresh your memory, Novocaine is a a shot that is used to numb a specific spot within the mouth. The place where the dentist will do surgery is where he puts the Novocaine. Simple math. Let me say that I praise God for that little drug today because having someone drill into your teeth and pluck out a nerve without it would be completely unbearable!

Thinking about Novocaine, oddly enough has caused me to think of the deeper things in life. Mainly the things of the heart. Along this vain of thinking, I came to a very interesting question that I had to blog about. I asked myself this question: Do we sometimes use Novocaine by injecting it into our hearts to numb the pains of life?

Do we try to use things in life to numb spots of severe pain? I think we definitely do. Different folks use different types of Novocaine, but we all use it to numb our hearts from life.

Some people use drugs, some people use alcohol, others use their jobs, their relationships, books, TV or movies. We attempt to numb ourselves from the pains, hurts and aches of the heart by simply inoculating ourselves with Novocaine. We numb the spot of pain and move on.

The end result of only using Novocaine to numb the pain is a heart full of decay, that only gets worse. Just like as in a tooth, if you don't allow the Dentist to clear out the decay and give you a new tooth (or a crown), it will rot. So too your heart will rot if you don't allow the Great Physician to clear out the decay in it.

I will not downplay how much our hearts can hurt. For in life, our hearts will take tons of abuse, see tons of horrific things and be wounded over and over again. The problem is, if we continue to simply numb out hearts, those pains will end up effecting the rest of the body, life and future.

Sadly, this rotting idea came at a BIG price for me. I ignored my tooth for a long time, numbing the pain with Ibuprofen for so long that it became infected. It was so infected my dentist said that before he can put a crown on, I needed to take 2,000 mg a of anti-biotics a DAY for a whole week!

I allowed my pain to be covered over and over again that it caused a HUGE infection. Also, funny as it may be, I had a fever of 101.2 because of the infection in my tooth! It effected my entire body, caused me to feel sicker than I could remember feeling in a long time. I was so sick, in interfered with my job. I couldn't teach Sunday School, I couldn't go to church because of a what started out as a simple tooth ache.

This same thing happens when we use Novocaine to simply cover the pain in our hearts.

This tooth problem I got myself into has given me tons to think about, tons to put into perspective and a lot to change. I don't want to simply cover up my aches and pains with inoculation after inoculation of Novocaine...I want to allow God to eliminate the pain. Heal the heart, remove the decay in my heart, clean my heart and make it new and whole.

It's funny how deep thoughts can come through dentist visits. Take a moment and inspect your own heart...have you been using Novocaine?

The Greatest Man Who Ever Lived

2009-03-23T13:35:00.001-07:00

In The Greatest Man Who Ever Lived, Scott guides readers in a step-by-step application of the life-changing principles, skills, and methods that Jesus used throughout his earthly life. Although believers may spend a lifetime learning from Jesus’ teachings, it’s easy to overlook the powerful lessons demonstrated in His life. But when these incomparable lessons are learned and put to use, they enable ordinary people to achieve extraordinary success and happiness.

From Jesus’ earthly life readers will learn:

How to break through the barriers that prevent them from achieving extraordinary success at work and relational success at home.
How to experience a level of happiness and fulfillment that nothing the world offers can duplicate.
How t o use adversity and opposition as a springboard for greater success.
How to love others in a way that increases their love as well.

No matter what a person’s area of expertise and in what setting a person influences others, living by the principles of Jesus’ life on earth produces extraordinary success, unprecedented achievements, personal fulfillment, and blessings for others.

Author Bio:

Steven K. Scott is the best-selling author of The Richest Man Who Ever Lived, The Greatest Words Ever Spoken, and Mentored by a Millionaire. After failing in nine jobs, he started reading a chapter of Proverbs every day—and the wisdom of Scripture changed his life. Scott and his business partners have built more than a dozen multimillion-dollar companies from scratch, achieving billions of dollars in sales. He is the co-founder of Max International, Total Gym Fitness, and The American Telecast Corporation. He is a popular international speaker on the subjects of personal and professional achievement and the application of biblical wisdom to every area of life.

To Buy this book, check out this site: THE GREATEST MAN WHO EVER LIVED

The Power of Sexual Temptation

2009-03-18T07:53:00.001-07:00

Hope that title got your attention. Today, as I was getting ready my talk for the Jr. Highers on Sunday, I stumbled across this verse:

2 Samuel 23:39 "Uriah the Hittite: thirty-seven in all."

You may be thinking: "yea, so...what's this have to do with sexual temptation?" I answer: EVERYTHING!

Here's the big deal. Uriah in this verse is listed among David's Mighty Men. He was one of the guys who stood by David during the time where Saul hunted David down like a dog to be put down. These men risked their lives to hide David, protect David and one day see him King over all Israel. Uriah was one of those men. He was there when David cut a piece of Saul's robes when Saul was pooping (1 Samuel 24:3-7). Uriah saw David's heart BREAK for doing that little act. Uriah saw David spare Saul's life, saw David repent of his sins. Uriah followed after David who was a man after God's own heart.

Uriah was there alongside David in many battles. Uriah was there protecting the life of his King from evil after evil that sought to destroy him.

Uriah was also the husband to a gorgeous woman. That woman's name was Bathsheba. If Uriah had a vice it was that his wife was pleasing to the eye. David, when he should have been at war, looking at the battlefield was instead reclining at home, looking at one of his Mighty Men's wives.

Here's the whole scene: 2 Samuel 11:1-5

In the spring of the year, the time when kings go out to battle, David sent Joab, and his servants with him, and all Israel. And they ravaged the Ammonites and besieged Rabbah. But David remained at Jerusalem. It happened, late one afternoon, when David arose from his couch and was walking on the roof of the king's house, that he saw from the roof a woman bathing; and the woman was very beautiful. And David sent and inquired about the woman. And one said, “Is not this Bathsheba, the daughter of Eliam, the wife of Uriah the Hittite?” So David sent messengers and took her, and she came to him, and he lay with her. Now she had been purifying herself from her uncleanness.) Then she returned to her house. And the woman conceived, and she sent and told David, “I am pregnant.”

I think David knew who she was, when he asked. It was Uriah's house David! He would've known where his Mighty Men lived! We can see this in the response of the one who said: "Is not this Bathsheba...". A Modern day translation would be: "you seriously don't know David, isn't it Bathsheba?" David allowed sexual temptation to conquer him.

The power of this temptation was so great for David, that he would not only take another mans wife...but a man who was LOYAL to him. A Man who risked his LIFE for him and a man who was considered one of his Mighty Men!

Knowing that Uriah was one of David's Mighty Men has now changed this story for me forever! We as men must always be on our toes for this foe that is sexual temptation. David was in a place he shouldn't have been that opened the doors for this gross sin.

I hope this revelation has shocked you as much as it has me.

Abundantly Blessed

2009-03-13T09:45:00.001-07:00

Let me share with you some amazing things that God has been doing within our lives (mine and Hilary's).

God has shown Himself to be generous to be sure. Hilary and I were worried about the change in my insurance at the Church. The change wouldn't have been that drastic, unless we were definitely planing a visit to the hospital...which with a baby coming, we knew it was going to happen. With the insurance change, there would now be a charge of $500 in order to receive care. This got us worried, because going into the month of January, we had some credit card debt. Not ridiculous mind you, but nothing to sneeze at to be sure.

We were worried as to how all of this was going to be done: credit card bills paid off, regular bills paid off, plus this $500 which seemed to loom over our heads.

Well, God has allowed me to earn enough extra cash at Chili's to now have gotten rid of out debt! Not only that, but God put it on the heart of a blessed fellow believer at our church to give enough money to cover the Hospital fee, plus some!

We will also now (thanks to the generous donation) have close to enough money saved up for when Hilary goes on maternity leave (she doesn't get paid leave), which with my job at Chili's shouldn't be hard at all to come up with!

I write this not to say that Hilary and I are amazing, but that God is amazing! We literally had NO clue where the money was going to come from...but God provided! If you are in a similar situation, may our little story of the past few months encourage you to trust God and know he will provide your every need. In times of financial turmoil like the ones we are facing, it isn't easy. Hilary and I were not the "face of calm" when it came to our financial struggles. Just know that the God of this universe, the one, Triune God is BIGGER than finances, bigger than America's stock-market and a whole lot more reliable than both!

Vintage Church By Mark Driscoll

2009-03-11T20:01:00.001-07:00

I know I've been plugging a ton of books recently, but I had to write a blog on this book. I couldn't help myself.

I've been following Mark Driscoll now for about a year. I've been reading his books, listening to his sermons and have enjoyed all of it. He can be crass, but his brain is deeply theological as well as practical. He delves into ideas and scriptures and comes out with some great stuff. This book Vintage Church is part of that great stuff.

There are so many things I could write about, but I will do my best to be brief.

One of my favorite chapters is Chapter 4, where he asks the question: "Why is Preaching Important?" This chapter really made me delve into scriptures and ideologies of preaching I never tapped or questioned before. It also helped me see why Preaching truly is important and helped me with my talk on Prophesy last Sunday. It made me think deeper about why preaching is important, how it originated and why we continue to do so today. I was reading this chapter whilst writing some of my ordination papers and it sparked a writing blitz inside of me that caused my Ordination papers to be that much better. God used this chapter to again confirm what I'm gifted in. At one point in the chapter Mark says something to the effect of: "I know that only the preachers are reading from this point on, because all the other people have moved on". I was like...yeah, I am a preacher and yea, this stuff is cool!

I'm sorry, call me a geek, a Bible nerd, or what have you but this book was a PAGE turner for me. I was talking about it, teaching from it and going to the Word of God to confirm it. Mark helped bring some questions to light some Ecclesiastical thoughts that I would never have thought about. Questions like: How do we use technology in the Church? What is a multi-site Church and what is it's purpose? And a lot more that I won't mention for the sake of brevity.

I really enjoyed this book, just like enjoyed Vintage Jesus. I don't know what it is about Driscoll, but I really resonate and connect with him as a fellow pastor. I share his passion for the Church, Jesus, the Gospel and for the Mission of the Church.

If you want to go deep with why Church is what it is and what can we do today with the Church...this is a book to read for sure. If you don't want to know anything about the Church, don't waste your time.

I would encourage anyone who is a Pastor, will be a Pastor or was a Pastor to read this book...it truly is a good, deep and practical book.

Youth Ministry 3.0 (Post 3)

2009-03-07T14:59:00.001-08:00

*To fully comprehend what's going on within this post, I suggest you read: Youth Ministry 3.0 (Post 1) and Youth Ministry 3.0 (Post 2) *

As I've said in my last two posts: I loved this book, it's clear insight and it's candid view of where we are to go next.

I think one of the constant threads that is going around in not only Youth Ministry, but Ministry as a whole is that you can't use other people's programs, ideas and methods and expect what happened there to happen where you are. So know, that this isn't a book that says: "Hi, I'm Marko and I've done YM right...here's how you can copy me". Marko simply lays out where Youth Ministry has been, what has worked and what hasn't. Then Marko takes us to the present times within Youth Ministry and shares the same (what's working and what's not). The methods and ways of doing ministry will look different depending on where you are. However, the heart-beat of the needs that are within Youth and their culture will be the same. This book highlights those needs and sends the reader back into YM armed with that knowledge to pave his/her own path with the students God has blessed them with.

With that said, let me wrestle with this book one last time with you on a piece that caught my eye. It comes in Chapter 6 of the book on page 113-116. Marko entitled this portion: "Finally, Don't Be Driven".

Here's what he says: "Teenagers desperately want to experience passion, but they sure aren't interested in being driven! And youth workers who embrace a Youth Ministry 3.0 mindset and approach will stop being driven by job descriptions, measurements, buildings, time demands and Messiah complexes. Instead, we'll slow down enough, deconstruct enough to be fully present". (page 114)

It strikes me that when I worry about how many teens are there on a given night, I get depressed when attendance is low and excited when attendance is high. This is WRONG! I won't be fully present when I'm depressed about numbers. And honestly, I won't be fully present when attendance is average. Being passionate is saying: "even if I have one freakin kid show up, I'm going to be fully present and do what God asks me to do!"

This is especially hard for me right now. My job description changed from full time to part time. I had to switch my Youth Group times and the teens aren't showing up. I've allowed it to get me down from time to time. It's affected my lessons, my games and my attitude. I need to be PASSIONATE, not DRIVEN. Trust me when I say wrestling with this little book isn't easy. Trying to SHIFT your YM mindset is hard. However, if we are to succeed, it must be done. Does it have to be 100% what Marko says? No. BUT, he's on to something and if we as Youth Workers don't see the same train...it won't be easy to get on it later.

I appreciate the time, effort and wisdom that Marko poured into this book. I truly believe this is only the beginning of this discussion. Shifting will take time and effort. It will take humility and trust. It won't be answered and done with one book, or with one person. We must (as Marko humbly admits he needs too) collaborate, discuss and work through this together. We must be humble to accept correction and wise to give it. I hope we can all learn from one-another, connect with one-another. Giving no Youth Pastor, or Youth Worker "rock-star" status but being all on the same plain and same page, pushing forward in the name of Jesus so that His name can be Great and students can come to know Jesus as we do!

Ordination Papers

2009-03-06T10:14:00.001-08:00

I am officially done writing my Ordination Papers for the Christian and Missionary Alliance! It has been two years of reading, writing and filling out paper work. It has finally come down to just the tests. I probably shouldn't say "just the tests" because I am sure they are VERY hard. Yet I am happy it has come down to the final stretch after so much hard work.

I thought it would be cool to put my papers up online...so I did. I put all 6 papers in one big word document. It is the size of a very small book (60 pages), so if you want to know more about C&MA theology, how my brain works on the theology or just want to read something on Doctrine and theology, please feel free to download my papers! I placed them on my Church's website. Just click the link below, find the document titled "Ordination Papers", click it and your computer will begin downloading! That document is hours of my time, so Happy Reading!

GO HERE TO DOWNLOAD

Christianity in Crisis!

2009-03-04T08:00:00.001-08:00

Let me start this book review by saying: This book took me by surprise. I didn't expect what I got hit with. In fact, the seriousness of the situation that this book presents was truly unknown to me.

Hank Hanegraaff in this deep look into the "Faith Movement" opens up a can of worms most Christians ignore, or are unaware of. I think most level headed Evangelicals ignore people like Joel Osteen and his silly "Health and Wealth" gospel, but never know truly how heretical he and his groupies have gotten.

Hank opened my eyes in Christianity in Crisis to the teachings of people I just blew off. He exposes them as wolves among the flock and rightfully so. He gives quotes, not sound bites mind you, but long, written and spoken quotes of these "Faith Teachers" that truly show the heretical, mind boggling theology they preach.

Hank doesn't just end there, either. He takes each piece of "FLAWED" theology, unpacks it, rebukes it and gives the Christians reading it the means to stand against such heretical teaching. I was shocked at how much there truly was! Hank's book is well over 350 pages full of knowledge, combat skills and illumination. I've read some reviews calling Hank too "harsh" and "mean" however, the Bible tells us how to handle wolves...and it doesn't say to be "nice" to them!

I can tell you that if you read this book, your eyes will be open to stuff you never saw before about such preachers as: Benny Hin, Joel Osteen, Joyce Meyer and TD Jakes to name a few. God will use this books to remind us that it is God (not words) that are all powerful. You can't speak your future into existence...only God can create it! We must rely on God, not our "Words of Faith" to get us through life.

This book is a strong theological push against false teaching. I think it is well worth the time and effort to read and understand!

TO PURCHASE GO HERE

Sex and the Bachelor

2009-03-02T22:52:00.001-08:00

I had WAY too much caffeine tonight and can't sleep. It's 1:53am and my mind is racing. I'm still stuck on tonight's "The Bachelor" show. **WARNING contains spoilers**

I only started watching the show a couple of weeks ago with my wife and her friends. They all get together at our house and watched the show together. I started working at Chili's instead of hanging with my guy friends...I'd get home after work to them watching the show, thus I was hooked into watching (that was my way of admitting I watched the show whilst still remaining MANLY)

When I started watching the show, it became clear to me that one young lady stuck out above the rest, especially to Jason (who is the Bachelor). That girl was Melissa. Jason was obviously digging her the WHOLE time...I mean it was blatantly obvious. As a man who has fallen for a girl, I just knew the way he looked at her was "the look". My wife and all her friends also saw it and we knew that he would propose to Melissa, which he did.

However, the other girl he denied, Molly was a sneaky woman. On the last date they had together, she gave him some hot sex. Melissa I'm sure had sex with Jason as well, but Molly turned the heat on...which made Jason stuck. Do I choose the hot sex over my heart? He chose his heart...for a time.

The Rose after viewing showed him changing his mind and asking Molly to forgive him and get back with him...which she stupidly does. The woman were stunned, shocked and depressed. I immediately saw the issue...even if Jason won't admit it. It was the SEX factor. He missed the WILD Molly.

Sex before marriage makes comparisons. We men lean towards our penis rather than our hearts or our heads in a lot of ways. God designed sex to unify, not separate. If you have to gorgeous woman who have sex with you, one was wild, one was sensual...the typical male will choose wild over sensual. However, the one who was sensual was actually a better fit for your LIFE...which is what a wife is, a LIFE partner. Jason couldn't get Molly out of his head. He knew Melissa was the one, the right one for him...yet due to his "encounter" he couldn't stop comparing the two.

Jason chose his penis over his heart, head and son. God has such a beautiful plan for marriage, the world has such an ugly one. "Sleep around, find the right woman in bed" the world says. As if marriage were all about sex, as if the health of a marriage was solely determined by the amount and wildness of your sex life. As a married man let me...this is a MYTH! Is sex a big factor in marriage? Yes. Should it dictate how you treat, love and cherish? NO.

This world is so consumer driven. It's all about the quick buck (thus the economic crisis we brought upon ourselves). With that in mind, why wouldn't a man choose the best easy pleasure? Because within marriage for sex to go from "eh", to "good", to "great" to "THE BEST" takes real hard work.

I am sickened by Jason and his decision. He should be ASHAMED of himself. He didn't love Molly. If he did, he wouldn't have let her go! However, it is a testament to what happens when sex happens before marriage. Comparisons RUIN. Melissa would've never measured up (even if she did) because Jason's fantasy of Molly would always RUIN what he had with Melissa.

This is why I talk to teens about abstinence. Not because it's a "RULE" but because God designed it in such a way that done any other way it will be flawed. He made it, he would know how it works.

My rant is over. However, heed what God says about sex. The designer knows how it works. Sex can and will be amazing. God desires it to be amazing (just read Song of Solomon). It just takes time, love and hard work.

PLUS, when done right, the TRUE love of your life, the person who will ALWAYS be there for better or worse, richer or poorer will be the ultimate lover whom no one can compare to!

Learning to be a Better Pastor

2009-02-26T16:18:00.001-08:00

Pastor means Shepherd. I am a Youth Pastor, which means I am called to Shepherd those crazy people who find themselves in the teen years. This encompasses many "fun" new life challenges, which include but are not limited to: puberty, Spiritual understanding, the thought of invincibility, the lack of self-assurance, the entrance of most sexual confusion, the entrance of self actualization, the start of real independence and a deeper desire to figure out the "why's" of discipline.

This is my calling...the Shepherd these teens. Not only am I called to assist them during these tough life challenges, but most importantly, I am called to direct them to The Father. I am called to bring forth Christ. I am called to lead them in Spiritual Formation, self understanding and a deeper understanding of God and His Word.

Here's what I've learned and will never let go of: I can only lead them as far as I have gone myself.

A Shepherd is foolish to take a flock down a hill, road or path that he himself has not yet traveled. He doesn't know the way. He doesn't know the terrain. He doesn't even know if there are dangers ahead.

I need to constantly follow God down new paths. Pave new avenues so I can grow in MY understanding of God, so in turn I can be used by the Holy Spirit to guide people closer to the Father. If I read the same devotional book again and again for years and NEVER venture to something new, fresh and anointed...I will not be doing myself, or my flock justice. Can I continue to read the same thing? Yes...but not to the detriment of reading, or experiencing new things.

I'm learning to go DEEPER with the Lord. I'm learning to dig into Scripture in places I've never dug. I'm understanding that this is most importantly for myself and God to connect closer, but also so I can lead these teens who have so much baggage down a deeper road with the Lord.

A shepherd can only lead their flock down roads they've already tread and no further. If I desire or expect my teens to grow...I should be growing too!

GIVE AWAYS!!

2009-02-23T17:56:00.001-08:00

Bible Study Magazine and Mars Hill are giving away 20 copies of Mark Driscoll’s new book, Vintage Church. Not only that, but they are also giving away five subscriptions to Bible Study Magazine and a copy of their Bible Study Library software! Enter to win on the Bible Study Magazine Mark Driscoll page, then take a look at all the cool tools they have to take your Bible study to the next level!

The Echo Within- Book Review

2009-02-23T17:37:00.001-08:00

Hardcover: 192 pages
Publisher: WaterBrook Press (January 6, 2009)
Language: English
ISBN-10: 1400074347
ISBN-13: 978-1400074341

This was a book that took me by surprise. I was amazed at how candid, how authentic and how well done this book was. I was expecting something less and what I got was something more.

The Echo Within was Benson's way of sharing how he came upon his calling, His echo of the Word God had whispered into him from the beginning of his life. He shares his mistakes along the way, his triumphs and his surprises. His premise is that God has whispered a Word into each and everyone of us, a calling that is who we truly are and what we are made to do. Benson shares how his Word is and was to be a writer. He shares how he now, in hindsight sees the moments he felt the echo of that Word, but didn't realize it at the time.

Robert Benson takes the reader on a journey of his finding his Echo Within and shares how the reader too can enter into this deep understanding of the Echo Within that God has whispered into us.

For me, the most memorable moment in the book was Benson's discussion of his time at a Spiritual Retreat. He shares how this was a HUGE turning point in his life's journey and this resonates with me because I too went on a Spiritual Retreat and had a GREAT moment with the Lord.

I highly recommend this book to anyone. It is such an open, honest look into our souls, our callings and of course, the Echo Within in which God has whispered into all of us.

Following Benson's story will help the reader to get to know about their own Echo and their own calling.

To Purchase this book, go here: The Echo Within By Robert Benson

Youth Ministry 3.0 (Post 2)

2009-02-20T10:44:00.001-08:00

As I stated in my first post on this book (HERE), I am going to unpack further some of the ideas that Marko opens up in his book: Youth Ministry 3.0.

Today, I will deal with two: 1. Getting small; 2. Belonging.

Marko contends (rightly, I believe) that in order to meet this new wave of Youth Ministry, we have to have a "get small" attitude. This is a MAJOR shift within Youth Ministry, because it's has been (in the YM 2.0 mode) all about GETTING BIG!

I remember when I was a student doing things that were called: B.E.O (code for Big Event Outreach). These were the big deal outreaches where you get kids in, throw Jesus at them ad hope they come back. There was TONS of money spent, tons of hours planing and tons of people invited. The bigger, the better was the mindset. It was programming for the sake of programmimg in a lot of ways.

Sadly, what ended up happening was it seemed disingenuous, fake and all about numbers. Marko states in YM 3.0 that this obsession with numbers must CEASE.

I believe he's RIGHT. All this obsession with numbers has hurt Youth Ministry rather than help. It has caused Youth Leaders to be depressed, arrogant and jealous. It has caused the focus of Jesus to be transformed into productivity. It has taken the role of importance from kids knowing, loving and living for Jesus into getting bigger, better numbers of people into the ministry.

Getting small would help down the road of true discipleship as well as create a place where belonging can be felt.

When I asked my Sunday School class of Sr. & Jr. High boys: "Where do you feel you belong...or in other words where do you feel most like YOU?" I received tons of good answers. One kid said: "with my music friends, doing music". Another said "with my fourth period friends" still another said "stage crew". Lastly one student said "At lunch with my lunch friends". I guarantee that you'd have similar answers if you asked the question.

We NEED to notice something about these responses...does anyone see it? OK, I'll help you...they are all...SMALL GROUPS!

Getting small, creating ways to be small in a BIG group will help bring students into a place where they can say: "I Belong". The students didn't say "At School, with everyone" or "With everyone at church" they said micro-groups of certain people. If we're honest...we'd have a similar response ourselves. We feel belonging in smaller places...less places to get hurt..less places to have people know our business and less places to be truly known.

I will continue to unpack this stuff. However, I ask you, the reader whether you are teen, youth pastor, youth leader or none-of-the-above to interact with this. Tell me what you think....good, or bad...I want to know!

The Power of Discussion

2009-02-19T10:24:00.001-08:00

This week in Sr. High, we continued with our series in 1&2 Corinthians in chapter 12:12-31. I titled this section "The Unit" since it deals with being the Body of Christ, which is a unit.

This week was a different type of week for the Sr. Highers. Our "typical" schedule is like this: 7-7:35pm gather, chat, drink some sodas and get settled in. 7:40-8:10pm games, some silly, some over the top and some admittedly LAME. 8:10-8:30pm "the Talk", then from 8:30-9pm small groups.

This format has proven to be a good one...very Youth Ministry 2.0 though (to better understand YM 2.0, go HERE), I know. However, the introduction of small groups served as a catalyst for our YM 3.0 setting to begin to form. This week, I took a risk and had no games AT ALL and had them open their Bibles and discuss. Lo and Behold it worked! Instead of me "preaching" at them, we (all 16 of us) discussed IN DEPTH the meaning of 1 Corinthians 12:12-31.

The teens were hungry for this type of interaction with the Scriptures and even asked to extend the conversation into next week (This Sunday Night). They allowed myself and the other leaders to help guide some of the thoughts, but they dug deep down and wrestled with the core of this passage.

I admit that giving over to this type of style is HARD for me...mainly because I'm not the sole voice being heard (selfish, I know...read THIS) and because I'm not in control. I decided to attempt this new format because of reflections that I discussed HERE.

God is re-shaping me, and in turn re-shaping the way I do ministry...it's difficult to learn "new things" but the benefits far outweigh the difficulty of it all!

Outlaw Marshal: Book Review

2009-02-18T05:40:00.001-08:00

Paperback: 304 pages
Publisher: Multnomah Books (January 6, 2009)
Language: English
ISBN-10: 1601420544
ISBN-13: 978-1601420541
Product Dimensions: 7.8 x 5.2 x 0.9 inches

This was not my normal genre to read. The story was very intriguing as well catchy. The characters were believable for the most part, as was the setting. The authors obviously took extreme care at keeping the integrity of the historical atmosphere of the Old West. The themes, robberies, attitudes, killings and law system were all true to form as the Old West goes. My only qualm with this book was the seemed "forced" Jesus. Jesus was a definite presence within the text, real to the characters and the transformer of Whip. However, there are spots that I felt the authors said: "Oh no, Jesus wasn't in this sentence...lets plug him in!" This observation could only be the way I read it, but this is how I felt. Don't get me wrong, I appreciate the presence, reality and saving grace of Jesus within the story...but the way he was plugged sometimes made the characters seem unrealistic.

The beauty of Jesus in this story is the reality that he transforms our lives! John Brockman "The Stranger" goes out on a hunt for a bad guy when he runs into another outlaw: Whip Langford. He tries to get Whip to see Jesus is the only way, but Whip doesn't want to hear it. Shortly, Whip sees Jesus and how he makes Brockman who he is. When Whip is accused of murder, he realises some things...mainly how important Christ is! Christ transforms this former outlaw and makes him a new creation!

Here is the "official" summary of the story:

A good deed grants outlaw Whipley Langford early release from prison and a friendship with Chief U.S. Marshal John Brockman. Another good deed (stopping thieves from robbing a train) gets Whip framed for murder and looking at life through a hangman’s noose. John arrives just in time to reveal the true murderers and lead Whip to Christ.

A new man and a fast draw, Whip becomes Brockman’s deputy. Life is still fast and dangerous, and there’s a pretty lady Whip would like to get to know better too. Before he admits his love, Whip is shot in a bank robbery. Survival looks slim until he awakens to hear his lady confess her love. Weeks later, they are married. (This is a beautiful piece of romance that should be read!)

Readers who are familiar with the Journeys of the Stranger and Angel of Mercy series reunite with well-loved characters John and Breanna Brockman. Western history buffs will enjoy a wholesome, fast-paced story where the Gospel is presented clearly. Christian readers will learn how to lean on the Lord in times of trial and non-Christians will have the opportunity to make Christ their Savior.

All in all this is a good book for people who enjoy this genre. Check it out for purchase here:

OUTLAW MARSHAL